Monday, February 22, 2010

An important message...

...from the Please, Please, Pleese Get An iLife Foundation:
The officiant wore a black turtleneck. The rings were brought in attached to a first-generation iPod. And the bride and groom both said iDo. What more could you hope for from an Apple store wedding?
I predict it will be buggy and missing a few crucial features, and will probably only last until one of them discovers Spouse G2.

The single worst thing about using Apple products is that people might think you're one of these iBorgs.

19 comments:

Joel said...

Resistance is iFutile, Tam.

Joanna said...

Channeling Woody the Cowboy:

"It's a toy! It is a child's plaything!"

How much you wanna bet they don't procreate?

Anonymous said...

I'm too lazy to find it and give a link, but Sunday's paper featured a caricatured Jobs extolling the virtues of the next big thing, laying on all his typical futuristic superlatives...he's holding a device dubbed the iBama with a screen featuring its own saintly caricature.

I don't know what the hell that says about either of them. but it's haunting.

Al Terego

staghounds said...

Oh no. I use macs AND own a black t-neck. Help, I'm being assimilated...

Borepatch said...

Good thing that Android wasn't involved. Oh, the humanity!

Ken said...

Nice Animaniacs reference there. ;-)

Ed Foster said...

I thought a Borg was anybody who walked around with a Bluetooth ear clip and talked to empty space while staring glassy-eyed and unfocused.

Have you ever wondered if there was really somebody on the other end of their conversation?

We raise them from infancy on more hours of passive TV watching than school and sports combined, them give them the ability to natter endlessly with other equally challenged cripples every waking moment they aren't in a classroom.

If all cells/tooths/berrys etc. fried tomorrow, what percentage of the population would go into psychotic withdrawal? Welcome to the hive mind.

ASM826 said...

What a couple of iDiots.

Firehand said...

No, Ed, that's somebody off their meds...

Add this kind of crap to the garbage Jobs keeps trying to sneak in on people, it's enough to make you wish Apple gets a case of worms.

Tam said...

ASM826 wins the internets!

Bram said...

Geeks of a different stripe! Wouldn't be so superior if it was a S&W themed wedding would ya?

Anonymous said...

"Wouldn't be so superior if it was a S&W themed wedding would ya?"

It's not so much a theme as an accessory, but firearms have played a part in many a wedding here in the South; we call 'em "shotgun weddings".

Tam said...

"Wouldn't be so superior if it was a S&W themed wedding would ya?"

I most certainly would.

Daniel said...

Good thing it wasn't an HP printer wedding -- those don't come with the hardware needed to make the connection!

Ed Foster said...

Anonymous, we have shotguns and weddings up here in Connecticut too. But we have class, and paint the 870 white for the church services. Actually, in my case, I believe it was a High Standard pump.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, nothing says "class" like a spray-painted scattergun, huh? Diff'rent strokes I reckon.

And since you referenced your case, on which end of that High Standard were you? (some of the best, most frumpy utilitarian weapons ever made, btw)

Stingray said...

"How much you wanna bet they don't procreate?"

Quit trying to get my hopes up. They're gonna have a kid just so they can name it, whatever it is, Lisa. You think the Boy Named Sue was pissed...

Ed Foster said...

'Nony Old Man, Were I to have bolted, I would have been the target. And I inherited the shotgun a few years ago. It still works like a charm.

Happily, eldest daughter got married a while back, and had her first punkin well after the 9 month cut off date. Youngest daughter ties the knot this July, in the same relatively undamaged condition.

As for the spray paint (I like to think of it as winter camoflage), Dude, it was High School. Actually, we eloped. A real 60's soap opera.

Speaking of utilitarian, did you ever see a High Standard automatic? They just put a doughnut shaped piston around the pump's magazine tube, slapped a cylinder around that, and stuck on a big forend.

A tad hefty, but they worked.

Anonymous said...

Ed, congrats to the daughters; it'll be a lot easier going in as a duo than a trio.

But as to damaged condition, it's the best damage I ever did. Not even out of h.s. we tied the knot and first daughter joined us 4 months later. That was nearly four decades ago. Not easy, but I wouldn't undo that damage if I could.

My daddy in law didn't have to bring his old double, but even in high school I'd rather see the beautiful old oiled walnut and rich blue on that l.c. smith of his (mine now!) than any color in the world.

High Standard's credo: Homely reliability. People brag about the Ruger Mk for a cheap reliable twentytwo, but there are scads of different odd/cool HS configurations for less than the Ruger. I still have one of their funky little d.a. twentytwomag derringers.

AT