Thursday, July 29, 2010

"Every __ in the hands of someone is a potential ___."

Greater Indianapolis Metropolitan Police chief Paul Ciesielski stuffed his foot in his mouth on camera yesterday, stating "Every gun in the hand of -- someone, is a potential homicide."

This is a fun game!

"Every _____ in the hands of someone is a potential ______."

Every match in the hands of someone is a potential arson!

Every camera in the hands of someone is a potential kiddie porn case!

Feel free to play along in comments...

40 comments:

Stephen said...

Every official position in the hands of someone is a potential abuse of office.

Bob said...

Every doughnut in the hands of someone is a potential myocardial infarction.

Art said...

Every badge in the hands of someone is a potential tyranny.

Yer right Tam ... it IS fun!

Anonymous said...

Somebody includes the police, right?

I hereby demand that IMPD be disarmed to prevent homicides . . . for the children.

Shootin' Buddy

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

Every opera goer and watercolor landscape painter is a potential Hitler! (Yeah, you heard me. I went the full Godwin. I just HATE opera.)

Popgun said...

I would have just HAD to ask him if he has one?

ToddG said...

Every microphone in the face of Paul Ciesielski is a potential embarrassment for the City of Indianapolis.

Ken said...

Art beat me to it. Durn.

Anonymous said...

Every video camera or microphone is a potential (career) suicide weapon.

AT

Anonymous said...

Forgot the "in the hands of a" part, dang it.

"Every video camera or microphone (in the face of a public official with a fast lip and a slow brain) is a potential (career) suicide weapon.

Gotta start using that "preview" button. AT

Mike W. said...

every penis in the hands of someone is a potential Lorena Bobbitt.

perlhaqr said...

"Every penis in the hands of someone is a potential rape."

"Every vagina in the hands of someone is a potential prostitution."

(Of course, I only think one of those things should be illegal, so it's not quite a parallel.)

Nathan said...

As I noted at Bobbi's, my best guess is that he caught himself just before blurting "a black teenager" and substituted "someone".

Andy said...

Every bat in the hands of someone is a potential assault.

There goes baseball. And cricket. Um, and I guess golf, too, really, as Tiger would attest.

jimbob86 said...

..... He's ignoring the fact that, sometimes, someone needs to be shot, immediately. If this were not the case, the police would not carry handguns.

staghounds said...

ToddG wins this one.

"Every pencil in the hand of someone is a potential blackmail letter."

(Or symphony.)

"Every car in the hands of someone is a potential vehicular assault."

"Every gun in the hand of someone is a potential prevention of rape or murder."

Living in Babylon said...

Every dick in the hands of someone is a potential Indiana State Senate.

dave said...

Every voting pencil in the hands of someone is a potential threat to the Republic.

Alan J. said...

Every p----, uh microphone, really I meant to type microphone, in the hands of Barney Frank is a potential sticky situation.

Lissa said...

Every piano wire in the hands of a musician is a potential garrotte.

Every RAID can in the hands of someone is a potential homicidal poison case.

Every stick in the hands of someone is a potential sodomy.

Every camera in the face of Paul Ciesielski is a potential stickyourheadupyourarse-itis case.

theirritablearchitect said...

Every pen in the hand of a mortgage broker is a potential loan shark.

I'm not kidding.

SpeakerTweaker said...

Every public office in the hands of someone is a potential law.

Every dreadlock in the hands of someone is a potential decapitated hippy.

Every head of lettuce in the hands of someone is a potential salad.

I could do this all day.



tweaker

George said...

"Every public comment in the hands of a bureaucrat, is potential slander."

wv: press

Bubblehead Les. said...

Every Blog Post against the Current President in the hands of someone is potential Evidence of being an Enemy of the State, and they need to be sent to the Re-education Center ;)

staghounds said...

Every gun in the hands of someone is a potential dead tyrant!

Every gun in the hands of someone is a potential hilarious surprised final expression on a rapist down at the morgue!

Every book in the hands of someone is a potential wrong thought!

randy said...

And of course, good Chief Keystone is ignoring the fact there is a category of homicide called "justifiable", as in self defense.

So, quite frankly, I don't see having a gun in the hand being a potential homicide being necessarily a bad thing, so long as it's goblins being shot by citizens.

Ninth Stage said...

As I said at Roberta X's place:
Every badge in the hand of someone, is a potential Fourth Amendment violation.

cj said...

I'll try a few:

Ever car in the hands of someone is a potential vehicular homicide.

Every prejudice in the hands of someone is a potential bad law.

Every statistic in the hands of someone is a potential lie.

Every cheeseburger in the hands of someone is a potential case of heart disease.

Stretch said...

Every tube of KY in the hands of someone is a potential ...
Um, never mind.
Sorry.
I was just leaving.

Phil R. said...

Every loaf or circus ticket in the hands of someone is a potential voter for the incumbent.

Steve Skubinna said...

So let's have some context here. Did he make this statement while announcing that the Indianapolis PD was being disarmed?

Matthew said...

Every bird in the hands of someone is a potential two birds in the bush.

WV: rifirad - what wv is designed to deter

Anonymous said...

Every good hempen rope in the hands of good citizens is reminder to politicians that their hubris and lust for Ruling Everything CAN come to abrupt end.

Anonymous said...

Every city-owned firearm in the hands of someone who is an egotistical elitist officer is a potential citizen shot just because I don't like your face and only cops should have guns anyway.

Brad K. said...

Every textbook in the hands of someone is a potential unibomber!

Every Bible in the hands of someone is a potential Waco!

Every swimsuit in the hands of someone is a potential nude swimmer, er, stripper!

Every naked breast in the hands of someone is a potential breastfeeding baby!

Every meal in the hands of someone is a potential surviving citizen!

Every job in the hands of someone is a potential taxpayer!

Every informed citizen in the hands of someone is a potential force for change!

Every dollar in the hands of someone is a potential Jerry's Kid saved!

Anonymous said...

You're all racists!

Bwahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahaha


Diamondback

Craig S. Miller said...

Every blog in the hands of a writer is a potential trip to the Gulag

Six said...

Every computer in the hands of someone is a potential hate crime.

Every Koran in the hands of someone is a potential jihad.

Every plagarized document in the hands of someone is a potential vice president.

AM said...

Every brain in the hands of someone is potential zombie chow.

But srsly, potential cannot be quantified so glibly. Human potential is only unrealized ability.

You can't measure something that is not real, as opposed to chemical potential, which is easily quanitifed. You know the outcome of a reaction before it starts.

You don't know the outcome of a human interaction before it starts.

Which is why guns are such important tools.

Anonymous said...

Why are these comments so insightful and intelligent?
Must be a better class of people.