Aside from my Crackberry, my knife is the most useful thing I carry with me on a daily basis. When I have to fly and can’t carry a knife, I feel like half a man. There’s nothing more annoying that sitting on a plane trying to open one of those little deli-airplane lunches you can buy on United without a knife. What am I supposed to do, tear at this packaging with my teeth like some kind of animal?When we left the Manchester airport and threw my luggage in the back of the Munchkin Bus, the first thing I did (after
Riding out the royal turnpike to the Duchy of Upper Cryogenica, from the rear of the vehicle, Lyra requested assistance in extracting her new plush baby seal (With Real Tail Wagging Action!) from its packaging. I nonchalantly extended a hand towards her and, with that implicit trust children have that adults can solve all their problems, she placed the toy in my hand.
I confidently examined the packaging, reached down to my right jeans pocket, and... uh-oh. I found myself forced to whimper "Uh, Marko, do you have a knife?" Which in itself is an inane question to me; what kind of adult goes about their business without a knife on their person?
I will never forgive the TSA for that moment.