Monday, January 13, 2014

Who could have seen that coming?

So it was a short news blurb, but it had an unexpected plot twist.

It started out pretty typical-like; just your basic everyday middle-age alleged mother of twenty in a tiff with some dude who was babydaddy to some fraction of her spawn. Apparently words were exchanged and he physically assaulted her and held her at a motel, and then the news story dropped the bomb, the totally unexpected plot twist...

Are you ready? You might want to sit down for this...
According to police, the man and woman were intoxicated at the time.
Whoah! Raise your hand if you saw that coming.

Fortunately, despite the woman having so many kids that she'd need to cut five to slide under the NBA's team roster cap, none were at the Motor 8 Inn during the drunken fracas that caused the po-po to become involved.

ETA: The Motor 8 Inn on Shadeland is just south of 38th, right between a liquor store and Weebles Bar & Grill. (I mean, in case you were in town and wondering where would be a good place to find a knife fight.)

25 comments:

Derfel Cadarn said...

What I am surprised about is that she can stand up without her entrails falling out. As for the fact that alcohol and/or other intoxicants were involved my only response can be, NO $H!T Sherlock !

global village idiot said...

My daughter thinks the movie Idiocracy was set 450 years too far in the future.

gvi

Anonymous said...

I don't drink and have been married to the same woman for 17 years. If it wasn't for driving like I am qualifying for an F1 race I would think that police only exist in movies and tv shows. There is something to be said for a stable, boring life.

Corey

Windy Wilson said...

A mother of TWENTY? I call BS on that, or rather, I call for DNA testing, this sounds like welfare fraud to me. In my town growing up I recall one woman of my mother's generation who had thirteen children. I think even at age 43 there isn't enough time for twenty.

Anonymous said...

"mother of 20" is possible. When I was a kid, one family in town had 22 kids,with only 1 set of twins. As I recall, they were all just one year apart in age, and the mother was in her 40's. A few other families had close to that, upwards of 14 or 15 kids. There was no drinking in those families, just lots of church-going.
--Mrs Doubletrouble

misbeHaven said...

Windy - If we assume that she first became pregnant at 16 and that they were all single births, the average birth interval would be about 16 months. A few sets of twins would reduce the number of pregnancies and therefore increase the interval.

Besides, the article only says she gave birth to 20... it does not say how many survived infancy.

On the other hand, welfare fraud is not implausible, either.

Ed said...

The same building that contains Weebles Bar & Grill (no claim on whether the patrons wobble but don't fall down) also contains the New Beginnings Missionary Church. Damnation and salvation all in one tidy, little area!

CGHill said...

It's worse than that. Not only does the NBA require that the roster be trimmed to 15, but only 13 can be "active" at any one time.

Windy Wilson said...

Ok, so it might be physically and chronologically possible, but my money is still on welfare fraud.

As an aside (do I make any other kind of comment?) if the media were honest about things they would preface a lot of reportage with "unsurprisingly", as in "unsurprisingly the accused was found to be high on drugs", or "unsurprisingly the Congressman denied the allegation of soliciting and accepting bribes".

Scott J said...

"If we assume that she first became pregnant at 16"

That's probably generous these days. A year or two younger isn't all that uncommon any more.

It still wierds me out to see people I graduated high school with posting on Facebook about becoming grandparents.

I turned 45 this past October and graduated high school in 1987 yet my oldest child is 8.

rickn8or said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rickn8or said...

At first I thought "20 year-old mother," then read the article.

ZOMG!!11!! Elebenty! 20 kids! 43 years old?? Call emergency! Get that damn thing shut off!

"It still wierds me out to see people I graduated high school with posting on Facebook about becoming grandparents."
Scott J-- Yeah. Same-same here.

staghounds said...

Welfare fraud? No way, that's far too complicated.

This sounds more like a knifing than a knife fight.

The cook we had when I was small had 22 children, all of whom were at least walking age. One pair of twins.

TheTrevor said...

One could make a drinking game out of the number of times a certain Motel 6 makes an appearance in each week's police blotter reports for my city. There would have to be a special rule for arrests made incident to the original call after an officer on-views some other nefariousness going on.

Anonymous said...

When I was in high school, there were one or two girls in my Senior class you 'went away' for health reasons. Rumor was they had kids. It was frowned upon.
NOW, it seems the majority of high school girls are pregnant, brag about it, AND complete for the number of kids!
Times have changed.
And we, as a society end up raising these kids, in one institution or another.
Very sad.

gfa

Robert Fowler said...

My oldest grand son will be 21 this year. That will make you feel old.

20 kids at 43, I bet she doesn't look a day over 90.

Scott J said...

"'went away' for health reasons"

That's how it was when I was in high school.

I switched from trumpet to French Horn in the band because the director asked after one of the girls in the horn section had to do that.

Lergnom said...

armedlaughing said...
"When I was in high school, there were one or two girls in my Senior class you 'went away' for health reasons. Rumor was they had kids. It was frowned upon."

What affliction was it? Our school had Rheumatic fever, but my wife's school used appendicitis.

Lergnom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Steve Skubinna said...

I don't recall anyone in my HS class leaving for health reasons, but I was pretty obtuse. Still, it would have sparked comment and discussion so I expect that it didn't happen.

There were tales of other high schools in the district where such things happened, but that was probably largely trash talk. Certainly it happened from time to time but it was not common then.

Mike_C said...

"A moment of pleasure, nine months of pain. Three months respite, then at it again."

Sadly, I can't even get worked up about this kind of thing anymore. Some might think SSRIs would help, but this already gives me that sort of glassy, detached view of things.

On the other hand I was a little shocked by the 400+ lb woman at the all-you-can-eat Asian buffet today, so I'm not totally numb. The embittered expression on the waiter's face was priceless. You could just see the thought bubble of "Well, there go today's profits."

Scout26 said...

The fun drinking game to play in Indy is "Guess which street in the 30's had a murder/shooting."

Bonus points if you also guessed the correct cross street as well.

Sadly winning wasn't all that hard.

Mister_V said...

I'm going to guess that "intoxicated at the time" will appear on this woman's tombstone.

Anonymous said...

In my high school a girl (16yo in 9th grade) who was pregnant with her SECOND baby was in the same health class as me. After the lesson on female anatomy she said aloud "oh, I thought if you peed after sex you wouldn't get pregnant."
Needless to say I laughed. Hard.

mariner said...

No fair, Tam!

You said it was an "unexpected plot twist", and that threw me off.