Sunday, July 27, 2008

Very grown-up conversation #187,432:

Overheard in the hallway...

Me: "So, really, Han Solo or Wolverine?"

RX: "Han Solo would win. He'd shoot first."

Me: "Yeah, but Wolverine would totally pwn him. He's the best there is at what he does, and what he does best isn't very nice."

RX: "But Han Solo is roguishly handsome."

Me: "So's Wolverine!"

RX: "Pffft! He's an over-muscled freak."

Me: "You weirdo."


Thus are great and weighty issues debated.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Shooting first doesn't mean didly-squat if the other guy heals up as almost before you can fire the second shot.

Of course, once you put lasers and photon blasts into the mix, Wolverine my have a harder time surviving the money shot that burns that whiskey soaked brain of his out of that tin can head.

It's a debate that fan boys and girls can argue (and do) forever.


Tokarev

Alan said...

I'll have to go with Wolverine.

Like anonymous said, shooting first doesn't mean much when you've got that whole instant healing thing.

All Han would do is piss him off more.

DirtCrashr said...

Wolver-wha? Who? You damn kids, get away from my Rascal!

Reno Sepulveda said...

That RobertaX, all she thinks about is guns. Here I thought it was like a Ginger or Maryanne thing

aepilot_jim said...

Is this the girl version of Ginger or MaryAnn?

Dr. StrangeGun said...

Who's universe are we in? Adamantium doesn't exist in the star wars timeline... blasters and light sabers don't exist in the X-men universe. Either would win in their respective universes.

Don Gwinn said...

Umm, no. Logan doesn't need Adamantium to take out Solo. He's still got the senses, the lethal training, and the healing factor.

Of course, inevitably, friends get thrown into the mix. Chewie, Luke, Leia, the X-Men, the Avengers . . . . so the real question becomes . . . . Luke Skywalker or Captain America?

I gotta go with Cap. The Jedi are basically idiots who think you destroy the universe by marrying a pretty girl.

Matt G said...

Hokey comic book armor and mutant healing powers are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid.

Michael said...

Han, because he has THE LUCK. Wolfie, not so much. . .

amcz said...

Yeah, but Han Solo has a bunch of kids slowing him down. (If you accept the Expanded Universe as canon.) However, they do have Force Powers, so that may turn the battle to his advantage.

Word verification: tvusod ("TV u sod"?)

Regolith said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Regolith said...

I'm going to have to say Wolverine. As others have mentioned, a blaster wouldn't do any damage to Wolverine. At that point, the only thing Han could do is run.

Phyphor said...

You ain't been reading / posting to Spacebattles, have you?

In all seriousness, this is the sort of thing you really can't figure out....and probably shouldn't waste the brainpower on it anyway. :D

As far as Admantium not existing in the Wars verse, I dare you to post that over on stardestroyer.net, Dr. Strangegun, some of those folks over there are so hardcore obsessed, they'll quite literally claim that Wars is so technologically advanced, they've invented *everything* - they just choose not to use it.

aepilot_jim said...

You know, we might be getting Han mixed up with Indiana Jones. And blasters and Adamantium... Isn't that like lightning and lightning rods? One blast and Wolverine might just light up like a neon beer sign.

Tam said...

"And blasters and Adamantium... Isn't that like lightning and lightning rods? One blast and Wolverine might just light up like a neon beer sign."

...and that would be cool!

Jeff the Baptist said...

Depends on the nature of the fight and how blaster fire and Adamantium mix. Wolvie would outstalk Han, but if Han saw Wolvie coming (and Adamantium wasn't blaster-proof) Wolvie is going to have a tough time with his standard bum-rush tactics.

Jay G said...

None of this matters, because James T. Kirk would kick BOTH their asses AND sleep with their girlfriends, too.

tom-the-impaler said...

And here I thought Tam and RX were debating which one they'd prefer to pounce on :) Now THAT would make it equal to the Ginger Maryanne debate.

Tam said...

It's a little bit of both. "Roguishly Handsome" is obviously important in determining who would win.

Anonymous said...

Blasters blow holes clean through Adamantium. Adamantium doesn't heal.

Wolverine would be hence known as the "Roguishly Handsome" blob.

1st rule of a gunfight. Have a gun.

Rule 2, never bring a knife to a gunfight.

Solo wins.

db

Ben said...

Ace mercenary pilot and intergalalctic wise guy.

Ben said...

Apparently I really likes me some Ls too.

Anonymous said...

Han and Indiana always shoot first – which is far better than shooting second.
AJ

buzz_knox said...

Given that the movies demonstrate that Han will shoot first and Wolverine often gets surprised (his enhanced senses come into play when he has time to focus on them), it all depends on Han's motivation. Does he want to stop Wolverine for a moment or actually kill him?

Wolverine has often been knocked senseless or even unconcious from severe injuries, and he takes a bit of time to recover. So, the first bolt puts him down and Han either walks away (his survival depending on how long Wolverine takes to recover and what Han does with the time), or keeps shooting Wolverine.

In the comics, Wolverine can recover from being incinerated down to his bones (this isn't established in the movies yet and we'll ignore the question as to how he regenerate tissue when there is no tissue left). So, Wolverine is a crispy pile of near-indestructible bones and Han has available to him a starship capable of travelling to such interesting places as supergiants, suns, and black holes. The question then becomes whether Wolverine can regenerate inside a sun or after becoming part of a singularity.

Brings a whole new meaning to "Shoot, Shovel, Shutup" doesn't it?

This episode in geekiness brought to you by years of not having a life outside of books.

J.R.Shirley said...

Logan would win all day long.

Duh.

Incidentally, Hugh Jackman was a horrible choice to play Wolverine. Scott Caan would have been a better choice.

http://www.exposay.com/celebrity-photos/scott-caan-walking-tall-world-premiere-in-los-angeles-84XzMX.jpg

J.R.Shirley said...

Try this:

http://www.exposay.com/celebrity-photos/scott-caan-walking-tall-world-premiere-in-los-angeles-84XzMX.jpg