Sunday, April 12, 2009

If only...

Oh, if only we had a force of maritime special operations troops, trained to board vessels under way and storm the bridge, rescuing hostages and killing tangos.

Wait... we do.

Oh, if only we had a Commander in Chief with the stones to do something about pirates other than simper and posture behind a teleprompter like he was auditioning for West Wing, such as unleash the hounds. I'm sure there are plenty of lads in the Navy who'd happily take a break from Sleeping, Eating, And Lifting to go bust caps in some pirates.

24 comments:

alan said...

There is nothing more cut and dried than what to do with a pirate.

That we're "negotiating" with them is an outrage.

I guarantee there isn't a Marine out there in the fleet that isn't itching to do the job.

D.W. Drang said...

I figure the GOP will re-take Congress next year and start issuing Letters of Marque and Reprisal...

Tam gets all the good Word Verifications: perflip

Tam said...

"Blackwater Maritime: Coming soon to a theater near you!"

Plus, a share of the prize money would go right to the U.S. treasury, too. What's not to like?

Andrew Weitzman said...

In all fairness, hostage rescue is one of the tougher assignments. Hard enough on land, even trickier on the ocean. That's why going MP5's and flashbangs is an absolute last resort, when negotiations have clearly failed.

That said, the French pulled it off with that hijacked yacht a few months ago. And no "you're in trouble when the French are" here. The Gallic spec ops guys like GIGN, the FFL 2e REP, and the maritime commandos are People You Officially Do Not Screw With.

Tam said...

"People You Officially Do Not Screw With."

Hey, we whined about Rainbow Warrior; they sank it. My hat's off.

Anonymous said...

The latest news is that the FBI is building a case against the pirates! They will actually prosecute them in federal court. And I'm sure the judge will give them a stern talking to and explain to them that they simply MUST stop this taking of hostages. All in absentia, of course.
And if Korea lobs a nuke into Seattle, the EPA will fine them for littering.
I'm old enough to remember when America had balls!

pdb said...

Not only are there NayVee peeps willing to take care of this, we have volunteers!

Quit your boring desk jobs and come join Stingray's Privateers!

auth: fecurobi. I think this is a former German African possession.

staghounds said...

Captain Phillips and his intimates might not be in such a hurry for boarders away.

His captors understand the deal- let him go, maybe live, maybe even get some cash.

Kill him, die.

Tam said...

Obviously the covered lifeboat is not really good for boarding.

I was referring to the Italian tug that was just seized.

tooldieguy said...

Opportunity, not time dictates the mission. How many opportunities have been missed already and how many more will be missed while we "show respect" to thugs with AK's?

Michael W. said...

"The latest news is that the FBI is building a case against the pirates!"

Well "I" feel better. It sorta puts me in mind of what Captain Renault of Casablanca fame said:

"Realizing the importance of the case, I have had my men round up TWICE the usual number of suspects"

It's enough to make a cat laugh.....

Anonymous said...

Look, if the SEALs were ordered to do their jobs (kill people and break things), then this might cut into the usual SEAL training regime of Sleeping, Eating And Lifting, plus the enhanced training of beach volleyball, getting resumes to Hollywood casting directors, and proper sunglass selection. All which are vital to the defense of budgets and careers, er, I mean the republic.

The Dutchies and the Frogs are out there taking on the problem and we send the FBI to initiate a criminal investigation. What's next the United States Attorney being helo'd in?

I can't take much more. Kill them! They are pirates and they attacked a ship marked with the Stars and Stripes.

Why isn't everyone in Somalia on fire right now?

Shootin' Buddy

Anonymous said...

Ummmm....public opinion among the Quaint Flyover Folks, seems to be about on a level with circa 1760's to 1790's American frontier folks.

Y'know: the one's who snagged the ol' rifle-gun and some parched corn, then jine'd up with the neighbors to go have a shootin' match, at the expense of Standing Armies of Occupation and/or Hostile Aborigines [who had fairer reason to be hostile than the Imperial Stormtroopers].

I sense a wave of Volunteerism Arising here'n there.

Hurrah, and beat the drums for muster,and Old Glory!!!

OK,yeah, I know. People will get hurt and the usual sloppy mess of war will occur. However, pirates may take more note of occupational selection, in the future.

DWDrang is right, all the good woids, here: pithe -- for which I leave to the gentle reader's application.

Joh, the Red.

Anonymous said...

UPDATE 12:01 Eastern Time

Captain Safe, 3 of 4 Pirates dead.

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D97H2SJ00&show_article=1

About Damn time

Rick

FatWhiteMan said...

Give Obama a chance. He needs to bow to the pirate king before he can do anything.

Anonymous said...

Breaking now.....

3 dead pirates, 4th wounded and in custody. It appears the Captain jumped out again and this time the Navy hosed them.

Gmac

Mark said...

I love happy endings. I'd give good money for a picture of Tango Number Four's face, I really would.

Mattexian said...

WHOOT! Ninjas 3, Pirates 0! now to the WTF portion: they want to bring the surviving pirate back to the US for trial?!? There's only one thing that bastid deserves, and that's to swing on a yardarm!

Mark said...

Mattexian,

Imagine how much more embarassing this will be, though. Dragged back in irons. Put through the courts. Sentenced.

Yes, it's not as viscerally satisfying, but it really is the best of both worlds. After all, the point is the Rule of Law.

Tam said...

Mattexian,

"WHOOT! Ninjas 3, Pirates 0! now to the WTF portion: they want to bring the surviving pirate back to the US for trial?!?"

They brought pirates back to port for trial all the time back in the 17th and 18th Centuries. Granted, the trials tended to be abbreviated affairs and usually ended with a hanged pirate, but still...

LawDog said...

The surviving pirate is sixteen. While that's about six years past the age of majority in Africa, I have no doubt that the ACLU and the Southern Poverty Law Centre are filing amicus curae briefs as I type this.

Firehand said...

I don't doubt it. Can we send them to Somolia, without escort, to gather testimony?

With a little sticker that says "I hate jihadis" on their luggage?

mts1 said...

I got home, saw that, and am now on cloud nine. Pirate chum, a.k.a. Purina Shark Chow. And a live captain, diving into the ocean, free of the dinghy; once again, giving Our Guys their second chance.

DJ said...

"The scene got 'tenuous' according to one official, shortly after the three pirates agreed to let the Bainbridge tow their boat. The sea conditions were worsening and the lifeboat was 'floundering' before pirates acknowledged that by establishing a tow, it would be a smoother ride."

"But sometime soon after the boats were hooked together, shots were fired from the lifeboat and the pirates were seen holding a gun to Captain Phillips back. Acting on a standing order from President Obama to move in when Phillips was in 'imminent danger' snipers were ordered to fire."

"They established clear head shots on all three pirates. One of the pirates was visible through the front window, and the other two were revealing their heads through the top hatch, presumably to get fresh air. It would be their last breath."

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2009/04/12/navy-seals-kill-pirates-rescue-american-hostage/

*sniff*

I, too, love a happy ending.