Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Overheard while out and about...

(Scene: Interior of red econobox stopped at intersection.)

RX (looking in rear view): "There's one of those brown IMPD cars behind us."

Me: "Po-po be creepin'. Act like you're not doing anything!"

RX: "But I'm not doing anything..."

Me: "Try to look innocent!"

RX: "I am innocen... You know what would be funny? If I had a very realistic-looking squirt gun and pulled it out right now and just soaked you with it."

Me: "Yeah. The funniest part would be when I was looking over the cop's shoulder, yelling "Taze her again! Get out your OC!""



(Scene: Exterior, grocery store parking lot. Johnny Law has left his cruiser running at the curb while he goes inside to play with the DVD vending machine.)

RX: "Look! Free car!"

Me: "Let's don't."

RX: "But it's got lots of cool stuff in it."

Me: "Yeah, like a LoJack."

28 comments:

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

~~snort!~~

Turk Turon said...

Lo-jack, schmo-jack!

If anybody can, you guys can jam it. Send the cops all over the place trying to recover their car.

wv: copun

pdb said...

Good call! That's like an automatic two stars, and you can't even take it to a pay 'n spray.

Jeff the Baptist said...

Heh, you don't have to steal the car. Just move the keys to someplace inside the car that isn't the ignition. Then park within viewing distance as the cop freaks out trying to find them wherever you put them.

What? You were just trying to save the po-po some gas and lower their carbon emissions.

Anonymous said...

pdb for the win

rickn8or said...

Jeff--
Noooo! Lock the keys IN the car! That way, the po-po's supervior has to come down to unlock it.

And as regards the Tam/Roberta interface, I'm beginning to see who the bad influence is.

Stretch said...

EVIL CRUEL TAM!! I locked my keys in my squad car (once). Sgt. had to come out with spare set. Rolled back to house and both 2nd AND 3rd shift gave me a sanding ovation as I entered parking lot.
Must make it to a Broad Ripple lunch to tell how my father sto ... er ... relocated a police car.

Cybrludite said...

They see you rollin'
They hatin'
Patrollin' they tryin' to catch you ridin' dirty

taylor said...

Everybody gives me a hard time for being a door-locking nazi at work. I for one KNOW that police cars have no magical shield that keeps them from being stolen.

Plus, your just setting yourself up to be pranked by a squad mate!

Now, when your key unlocks your partner's cruiser...that's when life starts to get funny! (hey, ford only makes like 120 different keys)

atlharp said...

What you guys should have done was climbed into the back-seat and start yelling

"What did I do? I'm being framed!!"

I am sure that would have gone over great........

Lorimor said...

Bad girls bad girls whatcha gonna do...

skipelec said...

There must be a law against you two runnin' together.

Anonymous said...

Park it in the copshop lot. Hilarity ensues.

KK said...

submit to SNL for skit. I think Christopher Walken should play the cop and Kristen Whig should be you.

Adam said...

LOL. PDB wins.

perlhaqr said...

"Yeah, like a LoJack."*lmao*

PDB's suggestion is good, but I think Anonymous@1228 has a better idea...

Take the lo-jack out and then park it at the police station. See how long it takes them to find it. :D Hilarity ensues.

WV: "strawdon" A Cosa Nostra Strawman.

Noah D said...

Cybrludite, I think that this is a bit closer...

Also, geekgolfclap for PDB.

WV: 'breabjec' - feeling pretty down about this tar pit we're in.

Crucis said...

That happened in KC a bit ago. Cop left car running to do personal errand inside a drug store. It was tracked and the lo-jack was found on the bank of the river.

They found the remains of the car about a week later. Thoroughly stripped.

staghounds said...

I like the turn off and hide keys in car option.

UNLESS you happen to be in the car when 5-0 comes out of the store. Because everybody knows, when the police have to come and get you...

We have one stolen and wrecked every quarter or so, always some 14 year old. I'd like to have the money wasted on police cars running unoccupied nationally for just one day, it must be astronomical.

rickn8or said...

Stretch, Crucis--

I could introduce you to a KC cop who, in his rookie days, locked his keys in the cruiser... under a traffic light... engine running... lights and siren on...

Feel better??

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

I came back to this post 12 hours later and it still makes me lol.

kbarrett said...

An I thought I was a juvenile delinquent when I was growing up ...

Joseph said...

You two could make your own reality show.

Tam said...

Nobody would believe it was real.

Mikee said...

An older friend of mine told me to carry forever in the future two car keys, one in each pocket, when I was young, stupid, and locked out of my car late at night across town begging for rescue. He was and is a very good friend, with good advice.

I wonder how many police cruisers have hide-a-keys somewhere under the frame, within reach but not readily seen in an inspection?

ditto said...

You don't have a hair on your ass if you don't at least take it for a joy ride!
Oh, thats right, you are a woman!


probably too old.

Anonymous said...

Who is RX? :P

The Archivist said...

I saw a squad car running out side the quick trip one night, no one visible, and the officer inside getting some coffee. As I went in I though how funny it would be if it were stolen, because the officer was taking his time, and didn't seem to be paying attention. As I approached him, he turned towards me, and I noticed he was part of a K9 unit.
I started laughing out loud and I had to explain to the officer my previous thoughts, and how surprising it would be to the potential felon when the 110 lb German Shepard started sniffing the back of his head.