Saturday, May 02, 2009

News Flash: HuffPo readers have difficulty with News Flashes.

When President Narcissus asked for more free air at prime time recently, apparently so he could add to his home Blu-Ray collection of "Me On TV!", allegedly FOX initially declined.
Fox became the first broadcast network to turn down a request by President Barack Obama for time, opting to show its drama "Lie to Me" on Wednesday instead of the president's prime-time news conference.

Fox will direct viewers interested in the news conference to Fox News Channel and the Fox Business Network, which will both carry it.
Okay, did all you brilliant VFTP readers catch that? FOX (the entertainment station that doesn't even show news programs, the one with Bart Simpson,) will not be airing the President's speech. They would direct viewers to FOX News, bugbear of the NPR set, who would be carrying it.

You got that, right? It was pretty obvious, no? It's not in Swahili or in invisible ink or some micro-tiny type face?

Let's go to our first HuffPo commenter, then...
I bet Fox News would interrupt Lie For Me if a high-speed car chase was taking place.
Okay, obviously some comprehension issues, there. Maybe he's a fluke...
Lie to me.... very funny! That's all Fox does!!! That should be the network's tagline. Lie to me! The show will be canceled long before 8 years and Obama will still be going strong. Fox news fair and balanced? One has to wonder if the entire network is becoming so unbalanced as to declare itself mentally unstable. CENSORING Obama's press conference is just one more lame attempt by Fox to control the message.
But... but... FOX News carried the press conference! Didn't you read the.. Oh, wait; of course you didn't. You heard the "FOX" bell ring and skipped to the end to drool some "BUSHITLER" into the comments section. Christ on a pogo stick, you are as dumb as a stump and as predictable as a sunrise.
Just in FOX news doesn't have a news division! "Unlike ABC, CBS and NBC, Fox does not have its own news division to analyze the event." Ahh correction Fox cannot analyze any event although there are really ANAL............We report you decide, NO that's not it, stranger than fiction,NO that's not it either. Out of balance like a bent rim yeah that's the one! Fox ran the show "Lie to me" this is the new GOP slogan. Ok GOP, all you had to do was ask from now on that's what you'll get.
You do realize that FOX is the one with American Idol and 24, and FOX News is the one with Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly, right? And that they are not the same channel? No, you obviously don't, because you are dumber than an acre of fungus.

You know what the worst thing is about the internet? It gives you concrete proof that your fellow citizens are as ignorant as you've secretly suspected they were all along...

28 comments:

jetfxr69 said...

How can I possibly be the first to comment?

"Dumber than an acre of fungus."--Tam, once again, wins the internets.

MedicMatthew said...

Tam,
Why do you point me to items that make me start to wonder about the average American IQ? I read these posts and then I go and follow the link and I see people's stupidity for myself and then I have to lay down and take a nap because my feeble little brain cannot comprehend how incredibly stupid some people are.

Jetxr69,
How many times has Tam won the internets now?

Borepatch said...

What's a hoot is that these were the kids who thought they were the smartest ones in class. They haven't caught on that they don't have enough IQ points to fog a mirror.

Mrs. Borepatch loves the "President Narcissus" bit!

Hypnagogue said...

"concrete proof that your fellow citizens are as ignorant as you've secretly suspected they were all along"

Which is why we cling to the tattered remnant of the Constitution for as long as we can. It's the only peaceful defense against the teeming horde.

In my maunder, I consider that it only takes 50 percent of the vote in any one state to give control of the state legislatures over to any one party. And it only takes two thirds of those state legislatures to convene a constitutional convention to throw the whole thing out and return us to tyranny, all nice and legal. Choose the smaller states and you've got less than 20% of the population enslaving the rest.

And, thus, I present to you your new masters: teh stupid. It's just a matter of time.

John said...

Part of their confusion probably stems from the local Fox affiliates having local news staff. I think they also have broadcast stuff from FNC for, e. g., election night and what-have-you.

Still, aside from the people at Fox News, the Fox network hasn't had a national news staff of any sort for at least the last ten years.

Thirdpower said...

Welcome to Huffpo.

Michael W. said...

Damn it Tam,

Quit trying to confuse the people with facts, it takes away from their closely cherished beliefs. Once the fact are known and the light shines on El Presidente jug ears, they will find that indeed, the Emperor has no clothing, and Prozac sales will go up tenfold.

bse5150 said...

Didn't Drudge just link an article showing how the Nets wouldn't cover Reagan's speech either? Does that make them as bad as Fox News - home of the Conservative Sith Lords?

Tam said...

No, no, no, that's journalistic independence. What FOX did was "censorship".

Anonymous said...

This just goes to show that the large sign I have on my office wall is as correct as ever: PEOPLE ARE STUPID"

Brian Dale said...

Thanks for giving me my morning chuckle, Tam.

-and DTAAOF joins the Net lexicon.

wv = feochy: a reminder to buy more ammo (it's already on the list, next to bread, milk and eggs).

AztecRed said...

I tried to explain this some nitwit and they went on some hippy screed about the airwaves belonging to the people and that only 90% of homes have cable/satellite TV (the horror!), thus there will be a "huge" swathe of people who miss our Dear Reader's oh-so important message.

TJP said...

Censorship? Fox is run by Congress?

That's some irritainment, to be sure. I suspect that at some point in the future, we will be donating to the tip jar to pay for blood pressure medication.

Assrot said...

Believe me sugar, after being a Libertarian and Conservative teaching at several Left Wing Bliss Ninnie Colleges and Universities for the past 15+ years, nothing surprises me about my "Fellow Citizens" anymore.

You do have it right when you say that they pretty much read the title, maybe the first sentence and then skip to the end and start ranting about BUSHITLER and other such nonsense.

The main problem with college students and the majority of folks with college degrees is that they were all illiterate when they got to college so even if they can read a little, their comprehension level is somewhere around 20%.

Most of these folks are also lucky if the have a double digit IQ.

We are surrounded by morons. Unfortunately many of those morons end up in public office setting the rules for how the rest of us should live.

Joe

staghounds said...

"...rather than have to be bothered with researching and reporting real news that people might get mad at them for running."

And which they would actually have to research and report- never underestimate the power of la2iness!

"It is far pleasanter to sit comfortably in the shade rubbing red pepper into a poor devil's eyes than to go about in the sun hunting up evidence."

As quoted in the Viceroy's Commission on the Indian Rules of Evidence report, 1872

rickn8or said...

You know what the worst thing is about the internet? It gives you concrete proof that your fellow citizens are as ignorant as you've secretly suspected they were all along... "No, Tam, ignoranter. You haven't met some of the citizens I have.

reflectoscope said...

I firmly maintain the only thing which needs to be taxed is stupidity. Think about it: A revenue source of unprecedented scope and depth. I don't think even the feds could plumb its depths.

Jim

BobG said...

"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public."
-H. L. Mencken

OrangeNeckInNY said...

"BUSHITLER"

Am I the only one that can see that BULER is full of SHIT?

og said...

It's like I always say: The internet was invented to allow you to hate people you never even met.

And porn, of course.

SoupOrMan said...

In my line of work, we now put people's illiteracy and innumeracy online for people to see. It's called "campaign disclosure reporting."

Buck said...

I've come to like Fox news because cnn,msnbc and the left hate them so much. Hell for the last week or so cnn has been the flu news. Fox was'nt the flu all freaking day in day out. Ironic that Fox is the intelligent one out of the networks.

Overload in Colorado said...

What about 'FOX News Sunday With Chris Wallace'? It's a news show that airs on Fox.

Dr. StrangeGun said...

And the fungus, not understanding English, merrily ignores the slight put upon it.

rickn8or said...

og--

Yass. But not in that order.

Alcibiades said...

Oh noes! Rupert Murdoch's gone John Galt!

(Hmm, most television producers hate it when their shows are preempted. Shouldn't Hollywood salute the Fox Network for protecting their income?)

Lergnom said...

"President Narcissus"
"Dear Reader"
These are great!
My own modest effort is
"Discount Messiah"

MaygarBowman said...

You know what the worst thing is about the internet? It gives you concrete proof that your fellow citizens are as ignorant as you've openly confirmed they were all along... "That's my version taken from my day-to-day experiences. There isn't a day that goes by anymore that Boobus Americanus proves it so deserving of that title.