Friday, August 19, 2011

Always scouting for talent...

via reader BGMiller in email:
A Secret Service agent on assignment in Iowa to help with presidential security has been arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence.

City Police Chief Bill Nixon says 40-year-old Daniel L. Valencia was off duty when he was arrested Saturday in Decorah.
Well, Agent Valencia, I'm sorry to hear that your fed career has probably crossed the double yellow of life.

Look on the bright side of things, though! Should the USSS ash-can you, you've obviously got just the résumé for the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department. They're always looking for a few good men who can conn a Crown Vic while they're half in the bag.

11 comments:

Bubblehead Les. said...

And if you Freak Out when someone tries to tell you that they're Carrying Concealed, you can always work for the Canton, Ohio P.D.

Anonymous said...

Working for The Man will drive a fellow to drink.

DirtCrashr said...

Half? Half-measures aren't good enough!

Bubblehead Les. said...

Troll Alert! Check the comments at your Roomies latest Post.

Brad K. said...

If I had to guard this President, it would likely have to be under the influence of something.

Tam said...

...and Brad K. wins the internets today.

Montie said...

Yep, what Tam said!

Justthisguy said...

Brad, I would recommend Serax. It gives total ataraxy, allowing one to act rationally without being influenced by emotion.

Uh, no, wait, that might result in a Mrs. Gandhi type situation. "only one life to give for my country..."

Stuart the Viking said...

Just this week I was talking to an aquantence about the drunken IMPD officer who mowed down the motorcyclists at the stoplight. Using it as an example of something that appears to be a law enforcement coverup that nobody seems to be able to do anything about. Then she completely FLOORED me by saying something to the tune of "God probably has a plan there and everything will turn out for the good." WHAT? Dude is DEAD! Drunken AssHat Cop will most likely get away with it scot free! Nope... "Jesus wouldn't let anything bad happen and DAHC will face judgement in heaven".

Man, I knew she was a Jesus freak, but wow... just wow...

s

Anonymous said...

I really think you're being too hard on the guy. If I had to pull that Indiana detail, I'd be drinking too...

Matt G said...

"...you've obviously got just the résumé for the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department. They're always looking for a few good men who can conn a Crown Vic while they're half in the bag."

It's funny because it's true....