Sunday, August 25, 2013

Minus 20 points.

This was a well-done report, but I'm going to have to deduct ten points for no mention of anthropogenic global warming and another ten for failure to blame Republicans.

90% A-

(Protip: If you live six feet above sea level, a six-and-a-half foot wave means your carpet cleaning bills just went up. The math is not hard.)
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18 comments:

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

My flood insurance should be super cheap and tax subsidized so I can live wherever I want! And you people owe me a comfortable retirement, too.

Charles Pergiel said...

"The American Astronaut" lives in Conneticut.

Bob said...

A few years ago on a trip to NC's Outer Banks we saw a mobile home on stilts in the town of Wanchese. Sucker was about ten feet off the ground.

Lergnom said...

It'ud be cool if there was a spiral staircase to get to the door. And a dumbwaiter for groceries.

Ed said...

Anthropogenic "global warming" or just fluctuation of temperature and sea level within periodic interglaciation?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interglacial

http://www.ncdc.noaa.gov/paleo/globalwarming/interglacial.html

http://www.ncdc.noaa.gov/paleo/globalwarming/paleobefore.html

http://www.myregion.org/clientuploads/pdfs/ncfl_lakewales.pdf

Just as dinosaur bones discredit literal historical interpretations of the Bible, traces of past sea level rise and ice core data that predate widespread human habitation and any effect on the environment negate the anthropogenic theory.

Kristophr said...

Anthropogenic Plate Tectonics is the new hotness amongst the anti-human crowd.

Old NFO said...

$300 grand to RAISE the house??? Oh Hell no...

NotClauswitz said...

If you dig deepercan't you sink that 6-1/2 wave in the basement? The released new flood-plain maps of Sunnyvale where there has never been any kind of flood that sent people scurrying to their insurance office - some believe that some (Democrat) may stand to benefit, based on the increased number of insurance premiums. That's usually how they work things here in CA, like the way the "Affordable Care Act" is pressed forward as a non-negotiable purchase (except for cronies and friends and exemptions, and...Chicago Style!).

Jim Dunmyer said...

My wife comes from Fairhaven, MA, where they had a big hurricane in (I think) 1954. It wiped out many homes, mostly seasonal, on the coast. The ones that were rebuilt were on concrete piers, some with flimsy walls between them, forming a room of sorts for storage.

Some of these new flood plain maps have been designed to bring in more revenue to help pay off the bills from Katrina, et. al. There is little danger of an actual flood.

Anonymous said...

20 points off is 90% A-?

Either we're grading on the curve or the math is harder than we thought.

Or maybe I'm missing the joke, which is entirely possible.

-chaz-

Tam said...

"Or maybe I'm missing the joke"

Which was inadvertent, and the punch line was "Don't do math five minutes out of bed on five hours sleep." ;)

Buzz said...

I gave Tam benefit of doubt. I assumed it was a 200 point test.

og said...

it's million man math.

Andy in San Diego and Elsewhere said...

We're going to have to deduct 10 points from YOUR score for using the term "anthropogenic global warming." The correct phrase is "anthropogenic global change." Please make a note of it.

Kristophr said...

"Anthropogenic Global Change" is easier to justify during a snowstorm!

The important thing is to get the word "Anthropogenic" in, since the actions of a few mammals living on the surface are obviously much more important that the activities of the sun or the Earth's mantle and core convection currents.

Just pretend that Snowball Earth, the Permian warm period, and the break up of Gondwanaland never happened, since people weren't there.

Anonymous said...

Sheesh. 14.5 foot is nothing. Our place on the Gulf requires a 17 foot lift with a 2 foot buffer for "velocity action", meaning waves. That is 19 foot in total. It's a FEMA AV Zone, which basically means, "you are fracked in the next storm."

FEMA every few years tries to revise maps and raise the flood insurance rates. Then Congress gets involved. The nice areas with donors not on direct water will generally get their map rating lowered (or stay the same), and those in the obvious areas (coastal hurricane zones, esp) will have their rates frozen or raised only a little.

"This time FEMA means it," everyone says. I think what they should really say is, "this time they cannot afford to look the other way."

Either way you are going to see some massive increases in a lot of areas over the next two years. I know in our little beach town in Florida they built a new market center just a few years ago which met all flood codes. Now FEMA and the state insurance company (which insures 95% of the island because no for-profit firm will go near it) are raising all their rates for the same market due to new maps. The street-level businesses which already accepted (and built) for a flood event to completely submerge their shops are not going to able to afford the premium increases. Some are already closing. Nobody there actually expect the gubbermint to insure their premises from a major water ingress. They took a risk - that street level cafes will make more than ones 19 foot above the water - and accepted it. What is annoying is how they took the risk and are still being told to pay more, even though they will still not have any more flood coverage. In other words, rates go up but they still are not using the coverage.

The fact Greenwich is getting hit is just desserts. Their politicians have been gaming the system for years - getting the same insurance as the Florida coast while not paying anywhere near their risk level. At least this one time, I can agree with the idea that they need to "pay their fair share."

CarlS said...

"Six feet above sea level" - depends on how many intervening ridges and mountain ranges you've got in between you and the Big Deep.

markm said...

Carl S: Except for places like Death Valley, if you're six feet above sea level and on the other side of a ridge line from the sea, your feet are probably wet already. Water flows from the land to the sea, and if there are obstacles to getting there, it will pile up in a river or lake until it's high enough to flow over them.

And with oceans, if you're standing six feet above sea level at the beach, your feet are also wet from the waves.