Thursday, May 26, 2011


Okay, California, it's time we talked about "sharing" again. I thought we'd agreed that you could have earthquakes and mudslides, we'd divvy up wildfires, floods and plagues of Democrats, and the rest of the country could have tornadoes all to ourselves?

You people are such attention hogs. "Everybody else gets a tornado, so we want one too!"

What's next? Trying to tow a hurricane from the Gulf of Mexico to San Francisco Bay?


Jay said...

I think I saw that movie on SyFy right after sharktopus III.
But as a denizen of New Orleans San Fran can have all the hurricanes they want.

Anonymous said...

"...tow a hurricane from the Gulf of Mexico to San Francisco Bay?"

Yes, please.

In fact, they can have Fla's entire quota for the year. That way both ends of the bridge can have a Cat 4 of their very own.

You're welcome.


Anonymous said...

You're makin' me grin here, imaginin' those winds whippin' through the Golden Gate and bouncin' around off the East Bay hills. A 3 cushion shot, sweepin' over the University Ave. & San Pablo Ave. intersection as it kicks east to hit Marin County and Mt. Tam, then angling south and funneling through San Jose and scouring Silicon Valley.
Once those areas are scraped down to bedrock it just might be possible to start over and make somethin' out of the area.

Anonymous said...

Indeed, they can have ALL the tornadoes that rolled through here, no problem.
Just figure out how to make them pop there instead of here, we've seen enough.
They can have all the hurricanes that *might* come into the GoM this season too.


NotClauswitz said...

But rural California and The Central Valley in particular *is* flyover country! The Midwest begins east of the Berkeley hills.
If you tow a 'Cain from the Mexistan Bay you wreck a path of havoc across Texas, New Huevos, Vegasland, and Azironia. Besides it won't be pretty.

Bubblehead Les. said...

I'd just wish Kalifornia would hurry up and have the Big One and slide into the Pacific already.

Anonymous said...

Maybe we could throw a few feet of snow in there, just for flavour.


Ferret said...

Isn't there something about how hurricanes lived in California and Texas long before Europeans showed up and stole them.

Wait, what was the question again?

Anonymous said...

If it would clear the state of the Girlie-men running it, then please send them along!

Ulises from CA

Anonymous said...

Just little tiny just barely tornadoes. We had one rip a few shingles off at the airport in Fresno a few years ago. You'd have thought it was an atomic bomb the way the local news covered it.

NotClauswitz said...

California is sliding North, it wants to be Oregon and wear plaid flannel and a hairy mouth donut!

David said...

I heard a tornado touched down in Berkeley, CA yesterday...

It did about $250,000,000 of improvements.

Kristophr said...

Dirtcrashr: The problem is that the dirty hippies won't just sit down and wait for that sliver of land to slide north.

They can bloody damned well sit down and wait 30 million years for their opportunity to become Oregonians, without all this Interstate 5 queue jumping.