Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Can you picture what will be, so limitless and free?

Oprah's last show is today. I don't think I've actually watched an episode of her show since I was in high school but, like a fluorescent light with a bad ballast, you couldn't help being aware of it in the pop culture background. For example, I will go to my grave unable to forget such scenes as a placenta-munching Hubbardite jumping up and down on a sofa on daytime TeeWee, even though I've only seen it obliquely referenced afterward.

You have to think that publishing houses that specialize in mediocre pop novels are bracing for impact, since millions of people are about to be bereft of book-buying instructions.

21 comments:

og said...

I have no doubt that O's newest iteration will be even more involved in telling people how to live, what to eat, what to read, what to wear, who to f***, than ever before. She'll have so much more time on her hands now to do so.

Bob said...

placenta-munching Hubbardite is truly inspired.

*bows before Tam's snarky magnificence*

Anonymous said...

Now there's a rarity I just can't resist: it's "fluorescent".

As to stomach-churning memories of the O...instead of a zombie guest, for me it is her jumping up and down screaming "everybody gets a car, everybody gets a car!"

Would it be just a touch paranoid of me to think that not only did Gov Motors provide those butt-ugly G-3's for her to take the credit and adoration for, but that the "other" O played a part it the orchestration? Certainly the M.O.'s are disturbingly similar...

O my God, maybe she's going into politics...can you imagine a more powerful ticket for the masses than O/O '12?

AT

Tam said...

"Now there's a rarity I just can't resist: it's "fluorescent"."

Yes, I know.

Apparently Firefox didn't call my attention to the typo because it will accept "florescent" as well for some reason.

McVee said...

I'm driving down Lake past near the united center last week and there's a line of big rock star buses. All lined up with their diesel's running. I was not aware what was going down and am thinking "wow, it's like lollapalooza but inside."
Heh, lollapalooza indeed. I wonder what the green room was like?

Let see, maybe lifestyle czar for O
or Ambassador to Ireland
Heck, He could probably make Her Surgeon General.

Bubblehead Les. said...

Since I don't recall ever seeing Oprahs's show, I will miss her passing as much as I miss the passing of the Millard Fillmore Administration.

Anonymous said...

Saw a headline yesterday - "Who will fill the spiritual leadership void left by Oprah?"

One of the candidates was Gwynneth Paltrow.

Man, when your society considers Oprah and Gwynneth spiritual leaders, you've got problems.

Alath
Carmel

Tam said...

Alath,

...and they can't even keep the price of bread down. ;)

Brad K. said...

We no longer have Mike Douglas on TV, and America continued since that sad day. Bob Barker lives on only in tacky commercials and reruns.

Groucho Marx isn't asking the $64,000 question anymore, and Lawrence Welk and Bob Wills are presented only by their companies anymore. Phil Silvers isn't an Army sergeant, Gomer Pyle isn't a Marine, and Col. Steve Canyon and Sky King aren't flying high anymore.

I suspect that America, and the Western World, will survive.

Of course, the timing is right for Oprah to announce for B. Hussein Obama's job. I note that more people look to Oprah for ethics, morals, and spiritual guidance than to our President.

Sarah said...

I'm going to miss Oprah's Book Club. Seeing the orange-and-white paperbacks helped me figure out which books to avoid. :)

Justthisguy said...

I am torn between loyalty to my Mom's native state, where there are no ugly women of either color, no matter how fat they be, and a sense of relief that that right smart Negress will no longer control the minds of many silly women, of both colors.

NotClauswitz said...

She got Him elected, so this new O'channel might be one big Campaign focus for Permanent-President channel, they we'll really be like Latin America.
It's not just the (signal-to-)noise, it's the effective distraction.

Matt G said...

No one here actually believes that an ego of those proportions will just fade away.

Brace yourselves for impact.

(Note: not intentionally put as fat jokes, btw.)

Anonymous said...

I accept the argument that this is merely the eye of the sh*t-storm.

Jim

Drang said...

"Florescent" means flowery. There's a small national monument or park in CO called the "Florescent Fossil Beds", the fossils are of flowers. Visitors are always asking when they glow in the dark.

And I'm pretty sure the "Everybody gets a car" thing was before General Motors became "Government Motors", not to mention before Senator "Present" became the Hindmost.

Matt said...

So now she'll have more time to peddle even more drivel on her network which i hear is called OWN.

I guess EGO was already taken.

Crotalus (Dont Tread on Me) said...

Never mind that she slapped Americans in the face by demanding that "America apologize" to New Orleans for Katrina. Americans responded quickly, even if the government was slow. This was racism, IMHO. And the Obama Administration was equally slow in responding to the Tennessee floods that devastated a predominantly white area in his first year. More racism? You decide. I think so.

Anonymous said...

@Drang:

I don't think you quite understand the order of things.

O/O '12...

Which Zero do you think did/does/will come first?

And Tam's writing is rarely flowery; a really good spellcheck would know that. So until they add a context function and snark sensor, she should just turn that shit off; she's way smarter than it is.

AT

Drang said...

AT OO? More like Uh-oh...

Anonymous said...

Danger! Clue meter registering Zero! :D AT

Anonymous said...

"placenta-munching Hubbardite"

Pure comedy Tam. Careful, or you'll have Scientology moonbats calling you a bigot...