Friday, July 05, 2013

...meanwhile, in American-occupied America...

I pedaled back from Fresh Market with a paper-wrapped bundle of ribeyes that was as big as my head. Bobbi was grilling those while I was on the phone with Jenn during the whole sordid invasion of TJICistan.

After dinner, we went outside and set off fireworks. Unfortunately, since I had picked up our fireworks supply from Kroger, it was all fountains, most of which were pretty, but lacked that whole fly-up-in-the-sky-and-go-'splodey thing that rockets have*. Fortunately the neighbors were carrying our slack in the rocket department, especially whoever was launching them from just across the Monon trail; those gorgeous starbursts going off with massive thunderclaps just above treetop height were probably in contravention of several international arms agreements.

It was still sticky and warm out, so I didn't bother throwing on a gun burkha. None of the thronging neighbors seemed especially fretted by the pistol on my hip or indeed took any notice of it at all, although now that I live in the city I don't wind up the display with a blank double-charge from a muzzle-loader or a few marine flares from a 12ga†. The squares don't seem too easily spooked, but we don't go out of our way to try, either; it's just neighborly not to.

*I imagine that rockets will be available at deep discount today at the seasonal fireworks joints that have sprung up in every empty storefront and defunct gas station around here. I should go get some. There's no law that says you have to set them off only on July 4th or January 1st...

...and I definitely don't do that staple from holiday displays back when I lived on the lake, involving a blank-firing adapter and a full magazine of M200. While I'm not certain how that would square with city ordinances regarding the discharge of firearms, I see no need to find out. There are sacrifices that are made to live among the hippies and their brewpubs.


Anonymous said...

We set off a large maritime parachute flare that followed a friend home from the sea one night.
Written in large letters was the following: NO RECOIL. They lied.

It’s pretty hard to escape and evade after you just lit a square mile of suburbs up like it was high noon but the gods were with us. I’m sure the police were more worried about the reports that a plane was crashing or aliens were invading


Anonymous said...

I fondly remember living in Prescott, AZ some 20 years ago. All fireworks were completely illega in the statel and fairly strIctly enforced. On the other hand, If you had a valid state ID you could purchase dynamite. That stuff makes awesome firecrackers.


Anonymous said...

There's something oddly refreshing about the fact that we now celebrate Independence Day with civil disobedience.


Sklutch said...

My txt quote to my friends was "Neighbors are launching firework mortars like Charlie's Saigon Offensive."

Which got even funnier for me when I realized a third of them were Asian and hoopin'/hollerin' like native rednecks, beer in hand.

Assimilation is *definitely* possible.

lelnet said...

Up here along the 45-mile road between one state where fireworks are illegal and another state where fireworks are illegal, there's a double-handful of fireworks stores within easy distance of every freeway exit. No, not "most of them"...literally every single one.

Buy 'em at the supermarket? Well, I guess you could, once you wade through the crowds of people going to one of the three fireworks stores that share a parking lot with the supermarket. Plus the stores that sit along the road between home and the supermarket...five of those, where we are. And that's just the ones that are open all year, and doesn't count the guys who set up tents during late June or the ones who get a 90-day lease during the run-up to Memorial Day.

It ain't perfect, but God, do I love Indiana, this time of year. :)

Wife and I watched a combination of two different towns' official celebratory displays and dozens of local residents' impromptu amateur ones, through the window of the diner where we ate dinner last night. Awesome.

Civil disobedience is good when it's necessary, but I'm happier to live in a spot where cool stuff isn't illegal in the first place.

Jon said...

The locale I live in, fireworks are illegal to use within city limits.

Strangely enough that doesn't stop people, and despite putting on a 40 minute show last night myself at a friends place... no local PD bothered to show up.

I have a feeling the local PD gives it a pass (rightfully) on the 4th as long as no one complains.

And who the hell complains about fireworks on Independence day?

As a bonus my buddy found an absolutely stellar Reloadable mortar. We had a good time introducing his son to fireworks and scaring the bejesus out of his wife and mother in law.

Rob K said...

If you ever really feel the need to do the blank-firing adapter and a full magazine of M200 again, my house is an easy drive up US421/SR29 and my neighbors either won't notice or will want to join the party! :^)

A couple of weeks ago, I was out checking the mail when I heard this enormous BOOM. It was the neighbors, shooting Tannerite about a half-mile away, the other side of the woods.

mustanger said...

My neighbors are lightin' 'em up as I type this.

This is the kind of night I wish I had a couple of 20rders of blanks to rip off.

That M200... is that 5.56 or what?

global village idiot said...

Speaking of civil disobedience in what is (as yet) a cradle of liberty...

After the parade in my hometown, I and my Wardens stood in our Lodge's lawn and read the Declaration of Independence to those of the Lodge who came for the cookout and those bystanders (at least a dozen or so) who stood on the walk and listened.

Reading the D of I in the comfort and privacy of one's own home is stirring and thrilling, envisioning the first reading on 4 July 1776 and imagining what it was like for the men actively committing treason on that day.

Reading it in front of a crowd, on the other hand, is....heady. My Senior Warden said he truly felt like he himself was telling King George to stick it up his ass.

As for fireworks, by 2300 My Fair City was enveloped in an acrid grey haze to which I contributed slightly with 65gr of Pyrodex from my P1853 Enfield. Didn't go for the double charge though I considered it.