Two more fun ones from the last couple of days:
1) A customer comes off the range, having finished up with shooting the rental SIG P-220. We allow switching between rental guns of the same caliber without charging an additional fee, and so he flags me down behind the counter and says "Excuse me, I'd like to swap out this SIG for the HK USP in .45."
I take the pistol from him, visually and tactilely check the chamber myself, and bend down into the showcase to swap it out with the rental USP45C. Before I can even get the showcase open, he continues: "That'd be the black, boxy-looking one in the front row, right where I'm pointing."
What I wanted to say: "Well, gee, sir, thank you for that clarification. I'm not sure I could have found the USP without your assistance. Matter of fact, how would you like to hop behind the counter and help me manage this place?"
What I said: "Thank you sir. Why yes, that is it. Here you are."
What I didn't say: "...By the way, your comment is going to get immortalized on the Errornet tomorrow night."
2) A customer is looking for a spare mag for his Walther "P-38" (actually a recently-imported P-1.) He appears unhappy with Tiffani's help, so she decides to get me. When I walk around the corner from my cubicle, he appears nonplussed at the sight of another pesky female being offered up as the solution to his problems.
"What do you know about a P-38?" he snaps.
"Well," I reply, "It's a single-stack service pistol chambered in 9mm Parabellum that operates on the short recoil principle, with the barrel and slide locked together by means of the toggle-type locking block now commonly used in Berettas. It's a double-action/single-action pistol (the first of that type used by a major military) with a hammer-dropping safety. It was adopted by the German military between the wars in yaddayaddayadda, blablabla..."
His eyes glazed over before mine did.