Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Blog Stuff: I'm just a girl...

As a woman working in a rather testosterone-soaked profession, I manage to accumulate some pretty droll war stories. Here, for your amusement, are a couple of gems from the last week:

1) I was getting ready to bolt out of the shop on an errand, when I noticed a customer milling about with that "I haven't been helped yet" look on his face. Since the sales floor is my responsibility, I decided to rectify the situation.
Me: "Can I help you, sir?"
Customer: "I need to speak with Alex."
M: "He's off today, sir. Is it perhaps something I can assist you with?"
C: "No, I don't think so. Tell him that Mr. X came in with that trade we'd talked about."
M: "Well, sir, I'm the person he'd refer you to; I handle the pricing on all incoming trades. May I see the gun in question?"
C: "Well, with his, er, beard and everything, I thought he was one of the owners..."
M: "No, sir, he's one of our sales professionals. Would you like me to look at the trade?"
C: (Reluctantly handing it over) "It's kind of esoteric, you see, it's a..."
M: "...Smith & Wesson 624 no-dash with a 4" barrel and Herrett's stocks, mid-'80s production. I see. Do you have the factory box & docs? The original grips? The tools?"
C: *Insert sound of crickets chirping*

2) Milling about behind the counter, frantically engaged in some errand or another, I notice a customer determinedly approaching me.
Me: : "Can I help you, si..."
Customer: "Yes, what I need you to do is this: As a licensed gun store, you can receive a firearm for me that I have purchased from an out-of-state store. I don't give you the money; this is just a transfer, so I've already sent payment to them. What I do is give you an address to send a copy of your Federal Firearms License off to. You'll need to have your boss sign it in ink. Then they'll... yada yada blablabla"
I didn't have the heart to tell this guy that I was the sales manager, and had probably handled enough FFL transfers in the last dozen years to make his eyes glaze over almost as bad as his painstakingly detailed instructions were causing mine to; plus, the place he wanted me to send an FFL to already had one of ours on file. I just nodded, smiled politely, and told him I'd try to get my boss to take care of it.

3) I noticed one of my floor minions attempting to help a customer put a freshly-purchased Hogue Monogrip on his old S&W revolver. She was reading him the instructions, but the actual process of sliding the grip on was causing the poor guy no end of frustration. I tried to elbow in:
"Sir? Can I...? Wait... Let me..."
I finally managed to get the gun away from him.
"Well, now," he said to me, "That thing's a mite tricky. There's kind of a thing stickin' out of the frame, and there's sorta a track thing in the grip and..."
*FOOP* I slid the grip on, and reached for a screwdriver to tighten it down.
"See?" said his wife, jocularly elbowing him in the ribs, "It was just waitin' for a woman to come along to show you how to put it on!"
"Wait," he said, with an accusing look, "You've done that before, haven't you?"
"Once or twice," I allowed.

I love my job, and not least for the occasional moments of unintentional humor it includes.

7 comments:

Mulliga said...

I wish I was near CCA so I could stop by. The gun shops in my area employ some pretty daft people.

Me: "I'm looking for any CCO-type 1911s you might have in stock."

Sales guy: "What?"

Me: "CCOs. You know, Officer's style frame with Commander style slide."

Sales guy: "Huh?"

Me: "4 inch or 4-1/2 inch barreled 1911s with compact frames that use 6 round mags - an example would be a Kimber Compact CDP II."

Sales guy: "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Tam said...

See? I'd wrestle Alston to the ground and sell you the CCO off his hip.

Now that's customer service! ;-)

Windaria said...

Awh... in story number 2 I would have just said "Actually I am the sales manager, they already have our FFL on file, and thank you for assuming that I don't know how to do my job because I am a woman, but if you try the gun store down the street, maybe they will appreciate your condesending tone a little bit more."

As for the first and third people... at least they sounded as clueless as I do, so I have a little bit more sympathy for them. I mean I have only been learning about these strange fire sticks for maybe... two years now.

Windaria said...

Also... as for the CCA blog... camo glock? Interesting... never seen a finish like that.

Be kind of nice to pick up a Glock 30 and 21 in that finish... hrm... oh well.

How does the porting really affect a glock? Not the external porting like is shown on that one, but where the porting is done at the end of the slide (don't know if that is the right way to say it, but I am sure you know what I mean). I've just heard that it increases flare and noise, and as a result I would rather have a bit more flip...

Alston said...

The hell! No one sells my CCO until I'm dead. Except me.

Now, I'd probably sell you all my spare CCO mags, out of the goodness of my heart. I have this affliction of selling my nice crap to people who need it, with the mental justification that I work in a gun store, and can get another. When it carries over into extremely rare items, though, it's officially an illness.

Elmo's aphasiatic twin said...

Tam, it would be a delight to trade with someone, male or female, who actually knows the business they are trying to conduct.

"I'm just a girl..." I figure you're operating on a higher mental plane than most, man or woman. Ramen noodles and book reading must be working out well for you. However, don't get a bloated head. Keep on smiling at us slow folks.

Dennis said...

Reminds me of when my fiance,(now ex-wife) finally decided she wanted her own pistol.
The "salesman"handed ME a Ruger Bearcat to hand to HER. and then said,"What do you think of that "little lady"?"
My (at that time)Ladylooked at him and said," I think you ought to take it back to it's mommy and let it grow up, now may I see that Super Single Six?"
She later bought a Frontier Scout from a different dealer.