Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Devolution...

If the 19th Century inhabitants of Fort Des Moines had seen an unidentified rubber spheroid with a protruding threaded rod lying on the ground outside the fort, they would have shot it up, and then gone and massacred a bunch of Injuns, slaughtered a herd of buffalo, and built a factory.

Their descendants, having considerably more gelatinous centers, simply call the bomb squad and cower.

Jesus wept, at least the panicky herd animals in Boston had blinking lights on their suspicious object. The Iowans have no such excuse.

15 comments:

willandleigh said...

The bad thing about this is the fact that it was "discovered" by a state trooper.
Have none of these people ever opened their toilet tank?
How much taxpayer money was "blown away" on this?
Jeeez Someone open the gate up, it truly is time to cull the herd.
Will

Rich in Ohio said...

I suppose pictures of the object are classified.

Noah D said...

"Toilet float had sinister look"

Perhaps it was an assault toilet float.

The reaction is even more odd, considering that in another story, it's asserted that "explosives [are] second only to corn in rural Iowa tradition."

Then again, here in Indy people are being held hostage by dogs.

John said...

I'm going to be giggling about that headline for days.

Legman688 said...

It's Des Moines. It's not the rest of the state. The same thing might happen in Iowa City or Cedar Rapids, but not in Clear Lake or Ringsted.

Anonymous said...

So it's true that IOWA stands for Idiots Out Wandering Around?

Nathan Brindle said...

Oh, that is teh funny.

Anonymous said...

As Legmann said, that's the city. They want desperately to be Boston or Chicago or LA. Out here in the boonies someone would have picked it and thrown it in a nearby trash barrel.

mostly cajun said...

Well, gee, dontcha watch cartoons? All bombs are round black things with something sticking out the top. TSA has thousands of people looking for just that.

MC

Old Grouch said...

"it had a sinister look about it"

Probably black, too.

-or-

"it had a sinister look about it"

"Hey Charlie, go get me a left-handed float ball."

Thank you, I'll be here all week...

El Capitan said...

I wonder if I can get into trouble for mailing toilet floats to my elected representatives...

The Freeholder said...

"ball-shaped", huh? Apparently not having any, I'm surprised that anyone there recognized he shape....

Michael said...

Was it an EBTF (Evil Black Toilet Float)? Perhaps it was an "Assault" Toilet Float. Good thing the "proper" authorities were called. You can never be too careful you know! They're the only ones professinal enough. . . ok I'll stop.

mts1 said...

Next they'll call out the s.w.a.t. team for hubcaps. Well, it looked like a mine!

I forgot, they don't make hubcaps that pop off of wheels at potholes anymore.

wv: glase - what our eyes did at the story

Anonymous said...

I have a sudden urge to put the hubcaps back on my car. After reworking them to look like antitank mines. They're even about the right size. Probably just get me in trouble, though.