Friday, February 13, 2009

Taking Retards To The Zoo.

There's a link at to a breakdown of what the ongoing Porkopalooza in the capital will mean for the individual taxpayer (I mean, other than your grandchildren paying $1,000 New Dollars for a loaf of bread, if they can afford it after having 50% of their wages withheld from their Wal Mart check as taxes.)

What was the link titled?
How much stimulus $$ will you get?

That's right. All the monosynaptic folks out there who think that money comes from the butts of government-owned unicorns think that the government is going to Give Them Money!!1!one! How awesome is that?


You're going to be paying for passing out this Monopoly money for the rest of your lives, even if you were just born today and live to be 100, and in return, they'll graciously allow you to keep a little bit extra of your own money. The only people to whom this could sound like a good deal probably get outwitted by flatworms on a regular basis.

There are mornings when I just put my head in my hands and think "Screw it, let it burn." But I don't have kids, so that's an easy out for me...


Unknown said...

"Economic Stimulus"

I don't believe those words, or any other combination of words in any human language for that matter, fully connote the evil inherent in committing untold generations of millions of purportedly free people to economic slavery and institutional servitude. This unprecedented debt construct is more than the euphemistic pound of flesh - it virtually crushes the very soul of humanity as global enslavement to an exchange medium. Spend now so your great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandchildren will live in an unstable, insect-like social order.

Diogenes said...

Tam, There are mornings where I do the same. You are not alone and you know it.
Love the comment of 'probably get outwitted by flatworms on a regular basis' Awesome. Am I free to use that blurb of brilliance?

ps thanks for being a light in the tunnel for us Cynics.

Anonymous said...

I shudder to think of the obstacles we are setting up for our children. I have two daughters and am continually trying to puzzle out what career paths would most likely be useful in our impending future. Defense (which is what I know)? Law? Medical? Hell, any thoughts?

Jay G said...

The morning news was running a synopsis of some of the requests for stimulus money some of the MA towns have submitted.

One of the requests was $4.2 million dollars to renovate a town-owned golf course in Canton, MA.

Count the number of things wrong with that last sentence.

Guess that's the kind of HopenChange we can expect.

perlhaqr said...


I've gone numb.

Ah well. At least I don't and won't have kids either.

Anonymous said...

Sheesh Tam, don't you get it?

The money's gonna come from THE RICH. Who are big and rich and fat and rich and can afford it. They're not going to be doing anything useful with that money anyway, they just swim around in it like Scrooge McDuck and stick it in their ears shouting "I'M SO FUCKING RICH HAW HAW HAW!"

Really, I saw an hour long special on CNN about it.

We are rapidly reaching the point where 49% pay *all* the bills of 51%. And there ain't no coming back from there.

Anonymous said...

Well, we had a good run; it was a nice republic while it lasted.

Anonymous said...

Figures that I'd pick today to do my taxes.

Anonymous said...

"Economic history is a long record of government policies that failed because they were designed with a bold disregard for the laws of economics."

Ludwig von Mises

Shootin' Buddy

Canthros said...

What's the Mencken quote? Ah, hooray Google: "Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard."

Nice Dead Milkmen ref with the title.

Unknown said...

"There are mornings when I just put my head in my hands and think "Screw it, let it burn." But I don't have kids, so that's an easy out for me... "

I've got kids and I think the same thing. I would rather it happen right now while I still have fight in me than let my kids do it.

Let it burn.

Anonymous said...

Tam, perlhaqr---

B-b-but if you don't have kids, then who is going to pay for all this?

My grandkids can't do it by themselves.

Anonymous said...

What we're all going to get is a hard 18 inches of 'stimulus' right up the poopchute.

Anonymous said...

i must now take this moment to bow humbly to the woman who will heretofore be known as "The Queen Of All Snark" and repeat "We're not worthy" over and over.

Chip said...

The American Republic will survive until Congress realizes it can bribe the Public with the Publics Money
Alexis De Tocqueville from Democracy in America 1835
I believe we have arrived at that point

Anonymous said...

Several times a day, I hang my head and think, "My poor children." I think they'll be starting from scratch in 10 years. It may take longer for us to hit bottom. It's going to be a long fall.

Daniel Short said...

Once you give it up, you won't be getting it back. This culture is full of people thinking they deserve something....and we are all about to get what these snot nosed liberals deserve. Father forgive them for they know not what they do.

Zendo Deb said...

Is there a capitalist country left in the world?

I think my plan of an anchorage in the Caribbean is looking better every day.

Sarah said...

We all get to suffer thanks to the Hopium addicts and their stupidity...but I'm going to be pointing and laughing. Why? Because the sheeple are going to wake up when the unicorns don't come. They're going to sit there, like somebody just throat punched them, with this "Wat?" look on their faces, and it's going to be priceless.

Besides: the sooner this economy/society collapses, the sooner we can go back to what the Founding Fathers had in mind...something that isn't made of fail.

"We don't need no water, let the motherf... burn."

Tam said...

""We don't need no water, let the motherf... burn.""


My exact quote to Bobbi this morning. (Is there an emoticon for a queasy smile?)

I calmed myself down by dragging a big box out of the attic, opening the gun safe, and fitting bayonets to... oh... twenty or thirty rifles.

Anonymous said...

I hope you don't mind a shred of disagreement, but when you said, "The only people to whom this could sound like a good deal probably get outwitted by flatworms on a regular basis", all I could think of were the people who think it WILL be a good deal.

- Congresscritters, who will amass a vast array of clearly unconstitutional powers
- Lobbyists, whose clients will receive massive "subsidies" or direct payments
- People who practice the economics of "pull"

Their shortsighted gains may or may not last through their lifetimes, but that's all that they can see. They are either unwilling or unable to see the rampant destruction that collectivism of this kind wreaks anywhere it's tried.

theirritablearchitect said...

"The only people to whom this could sound like a good deal probably get outwitted by flatworms on a regular basis."

Jeezis, QotD material.

And yes, let the MF burn, it's the ONLY way some will learn...and we'll get to do some much needed weeding while the burn happens.

WV: troly....yes, I suppose it might be.

Jenny said...

Think that's fun - look at the ad that was on that radio show page you mentioned last night.

swear to gosh. Last night that "billions available to claim for..." was finished with "for rent and groceries."

I'm sure they thought *someone* wouldn't be offended by "the feds will buy my groceries?" - but yikes.

Tangalor said...

Oh brother. This doesn't strike me as surprising, though.

You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.

And you certainly can't do it by printing paper and expecting things to stay the same. >.>

Anonymous said...

the economics of "pull"

Rand was so short; still she managed to drive the engine of the 20th Century Ltd once, and had her pitcher took doing it.

Didn't anybody ever get her to try trap shooting?

I suppose she'd object to a scattergun approach...

Anonymous said...

Watch it burn?

I have 5 kids......little ones..... and it has become a temptation to become an arsonist, in the hope that the fires will be out in their lifetimes.

fast richard said...

Dead Milkmen?

I thought the title was a Bill Cosby reference. I must be getting old, my pop-culture database is decades past it's use-by date.

Laughingdog said...

I've come up with a pretty steady routine to keep the stress from all the Hopey Changey manageable.

A couple of months ago, I took my girlfriend to the range to teach her to shoot. It took a few times before she was good and hooked. Seing a few prime examples of your typical range cowboy there the third time didn't hurt. The money quote of the night from her was "what's the point in shooting that fast if you never hit the paper?".

Now we go to the range once or twice a week. While she shoots 50-100 rounds of .22LR, and magazine or two of something bigger, I fill up a gallon ziploc with all the 9mm, .45ACP, .44 Mag, and .357/.38 brass I can find. When I get home, I turn the 9mm and .45ACP into as much live ammo as I can manage. When I run out of brass, we make another trip to the range.

I don't expect to ever have a "Todd Jarrett" sized stockpile of ammo. But the hitting the 5000+ mark before the Hopey Changey really gets broken off in our collective patooties would be nice.

Fortunately, if things ever really hit the point of collapse, I can always move back to the family farm. Granted, I don't think any of us are eager to make the switch from selling meat goats to buy steak to actually eating goat.

Old NFO said...

Tam, did the math, it works out to a little over $75k for every man, woman and child over the age of 16 working today over the course of thier lives. That is in ADDITION to the regular taxes.

Joseph said...

I feel like starting last year, that I was alone in thinking that a stimulus check of any sort is an awful idea and the bad dream of a Bush stimulus has steadily grown into a monster of a nightmare.

At this point, I've given up all hope that some form of sense will return to government and the US is utterly screwed, as in you can't turn this around with anything short of a reboot.

If anyone thinks republicans will do anything differently, I've got 8 years of data to refute such wrong-headedness.

I'm with you Tam, FUCK IT!

Anonymous said...

I guess when it starts burning, Mr. HopeyChangey will still be trying to hose everything BUT that.

Anonymous said...

I don't have children either, but maybe that's the problem. There's too many libtards and f***tards out there inbreeding and not enough of us breeding to counter them.

We can't pass on our Liberty genes if we're not coming together.

Forget a good strong dose of chlorine in the gene pool, I want all my little swimmers armed to the gills.

Anonymous said...


You got 14 new kids on the way to counter the creature's offspring?

Who is John Galt indeed

Anonymous said...

"...and think "Screw it, let it burn."

Yes. And just as sometimes a "rescue" operation turns into a "recovery" operation, I have shifted from trying to prevent the $hitstorm to trying to survive it.

Anonymous said...

I've been feeling all depressed and miserable about all these "stimulus" packages for a while now, but then I realized that the Australian government is going to give me $900*, and I've been meaning to get myself some guns and ammo for a while now. Suddenly it all feels better. :-)

*Well actually they're going to take several grand, and then return $900, but it sounds better how I said it.

Anonymous said...

^^ Hey, my Australian counterpart!

I know, Tam. But look on the bright side: the second bill will only crush us with three and a quarter trillion in debt for the next ten years--I mean, in addition to the other (ever-increasing) operating expenses and the loans that won't be serviced.

Now would be a good time to experiment with finding the right ratio of insects to mud. It will be useful to have a dirt patty that holds together when you're flipping it on the hot piece of sheet metal you found blowing around in the post-apocalyptic wasteland.

Also: I note the headline regarding Flight 1549. Canada geese are sky vermin. We should stop protecting the resident ones and start blasting them.

phlegmfatale said...

The entire prospect is dazzling, eye-watering in scope. How can so many people be so foolish? Secession never sounded so good.

perlhaqr said...

TJP: Not so hasty. Best save those Canada Geese for when there's nothing else left to eat.

Phlegm: I'd be down, but I either need to move somewhere else first, or join up with another couple states in it. If New Mexico secedes, well, we're kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place at that point.

But, as mentioned in another thread, elseweb: AZ, NM, TX wouldn't be bad, and would have a coastline. OK, CO, and UT, if they wanna come.

OrangeNeck: We can't possibly outbreed them. We believe in actually being able to pay for our own kids.

I wonder how hard it would be to take over Cuba.

Jeff said...

My wife and I were discussing this the other night. She works at a big box home improvement store and many of her co-workers are looking for a check. The only thing we could figure is that they are relating the word "stimulus" to the stimulus they got last year in the form of a check. Also, we noticed that many of the news stories about the bill on tv show film of checks being printed.
I guess they're just not paying attention.

Anonymous said...

I regret that I am now to die in the belief, that the useless sacrifice of themselves by the generation of 1776, to acquire self-government and happiness to their country, is to be thrown away by the unwise and unworthy passions of their sons, and that my only consolation is to be, that I live not to weep over it.

Diamond Mair said...

Our USPS delivery lady was telling me, she's having people wait by their mailboxes daily for HER to deliver their "money from the government" & getting angry AT HER because their checks aren't 'in the mail' ................


Semper Fi'