Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Just so y'all know...

...our lawn is mowed. We don't want any SWAT team trouble 'round here.


(...and just for the record, they didn't deploy the tactical team due to his lack of horticultural maintenance; they deployed it because he threw down on the lawn-mowing guy with a gauge. A handy exemplar of how stuff can spiral out of control pretty darn quickly.)

15 comments:

Warthog said...

Perhaps they don't visit your house because they know that you both have more guns than they do and are probably a better shot?

Tremaine said...

I can see it from both angles. On the one hand a guy should be able to let his house fall down around his ears if he wants. That's his buisness.

But having a house like that is bad for the community and it drives down the value of adjacent houses.

Plus, Pulling a shotgun on John Deer is not an appropriate response to a free lawn mowing.

Just saying.

Nathan Brindle said...

Hmm...can I get that SWAT team to come out and make my next door neighbor cut his lawn, too? And clean up the fallen branches? And the three-year-old bags of leaves? And the fungus growing on them?

Please?

John said...

Seed, Weed, And Trim?

Grumpyunk said...

From reading the story it sounds like he's got a couple of wires crossed in his head or he's an asshole deluxe.

Either way, don't live where a homeowner association or a city can tell you how high the grass can be.

Lucky no one got hurt.

Frank W. James said...

Yeah, but all the Indy TV stations yesterday during their station break sound-bites made it sound like the city called out the boys because of his tall grass.

Only later did they reveal the real reasons. What disception.

All The Best,
Frank W. James

staghounds said...

What about the EARTH??!!!!11??

I can hear the cries of the ravaged, tormented blades of grass from here as they bleed, torn asunder by man's cruel and meaningless drive for "order".

So what if tall grass is a so called "danger"? A rat and a snake are a pig are a boy, all with as much right to live and reproduce in safety.

And fire cleanses Gaia's skin of the lesions humanity put there.

Oh, the horror.

roy in nipomo said...

Tremaine -

I strongly doubt that the lawn mowing was free. The gov't agencies I'm familiar with will do the labor for you, but you will be billed for it (and the rate is usually much higher than a private contractor charges).

Bram said...

Since there is a Home Owners Association mentioned in the article, I assume this guy lives in a planned or gated community. He probably signed a property owners’ agreement – a contract – when he moved in. The contract would have specified property upkeep.

Don Gwinn said...

He's lucky the didn't send in the HOA SRU/LRU team. He'd be waking up naked and hooded in the cellar of the nicest house on the block on a hard chair under hot lights with his wrists and ankles zip-tied.

The HOA answers to no one.

Anonymous said...

"with a guage." Made me giggle 'cause I pictured, "Vanilla with a nine."

Brass

Top of the Chain said...

Umm, mine wasn't ass high to a giraffe quite yet, it was taller than what I normally keep it. Thanks for the gentle reminder Tam.

Matt G said...

"At the end of the day, SWAT did its job and a misdemeanor charge was leveled against Rhymes and the grass got cut."

Do WHAT? He pointed his shotgun at the lawn mower man, and they arrested him for a piddlin' Misdemeanor? That's Agg Assault, 'round here.

Anonymous said...

Indiana does not have Assault, aggravated or otherwise, as the State of 'round here does. Pointing a Firearm is a misdemeanor if the weapon is unloaded. Indiana Code 35-47-4-3.

Just because the police arrested him for a misdemeanor, or conspiracy to steal the moon, does not mean that Ferret Face, er, I mean the Marion County Prosecuting Attorney, Carl "when do I get to be Gov.?" Brizzi, will not prosecute him for Intimidation, Criminal Recklessness with a Deadly Weapon both D Felonies (6 months to 3 years).

Shootin' Buddy

Nathan Brindle said...

Wow. My above-referenced neighbor cut his lawn yesterday.

Maybe he heard about this story :)