Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Overheard in... uh... that room...

Scene: Roseholme Cottage interior. Specifically, the smallest room. I am in there with both water and fart fan running. Roomie is in bedroom one door down...

RX: "When I get home tonight atomic bottle sneeze-alanche."

Me: "BEG PARDON?"

RX: "When I get home tonight atomic bottle sneeze-alanche."

Me: "I'M STILL NOT PARSING!"

(footsteps approach the door...)

RX: "When I get home tonight, I'll have to do a couple loads of laundry."

Me: "Oh! 'I've got a lot of jeans to wash'! Suddenly the candlestick turns into two faces!"

10 comments:

GrantCunningham said...

Reminds me of the telegram (anybody remember those?) that President Truman reportedly sent to a reviewer who questioned the acting ability of the President's daughter:

"I am sitting in the smallest room in the house with your review before me. Shortly, it will be behind me."

-=[ Grant ]=-

OrangeNeckInNY said...

I confoooosed!

Joanna said...

This sort of thing makes me wish I had a roommate, until I remember all those years when I actually did have a roommate ... *shudders* I'll have to settle for a cat that bites my ankles and doesn't steal my food.

Ken said...

Johnny and the Mothers are playing "Stompin' at the Savoy" in Vermont tonight.

Matt G said...

Joanna, an AWESOME roommate makes all the difference.

Tam-- I'm finding that my hearing is getting to the point where I hear the fart fan running all the time... and it sounds like a bearing's beginning to go. :(

Rob K said...

Atomic Bottle Sneeze-alanche? Aren't they playing at the Vogue tonight?

:^)

Joanna said...

Matt G: Agreed. Unfortunately, I've either had (or been) a sucky roommate from about, oh, eighth grade to when I got my own place. And I do not want to share my place right now.

reflectoscope said...

I wonder if you could persuade RX to wire each room in the house with one of those hand-crank field telephones, for precisely these occasions.

Jim

B Smith said...

(singin'): "Therrre's a bathroom on the right."

WV: dowhydra: better monsters through chemistry

Anonymous said...

Now, I gotta a buncha plausibile causibles, f'r echo-room deafness. But y'r waaay too young f'r such ear-muffiness.

Hell, as boy scouts, we shot indooor gallery .22, while the adults shot .38's, with no ear protection at all. And I learned to shoot CF rifles w/nuthin' but earwax in there. The US Mil DID provide earplugs, but then there ARE non-earplug situations when y'r a wearin' uv tha' Greeen.

but really, I think it was the MC5 out of Dee-troit, playing in a little cinderblock bar cica 1969 [?],that put the real hurt on those flimsy filaments. Now there WAS sound you couldn't hear, didn't need ears for to feel it in y'r skull, and produced icepick pain where y'r eardrums usta be..

In fact, I'm not sure rock concerts didn't actually contribute the most to my wife being heard as saying, "John, Mmmiumph a blmmmm wha and we'll bumbbbaa a brrrrppph."

However, you can take fo' real, that eventually small room hearing will become the large room auditory reality. But ya gots lotsa time yet, and youse kids is smarter about hearing protection, too. Just don't crank those headphones onto the sonic hurt setting, and y'll be fine.

Say, do ya think those upcoming electronic inner body on board speaker thingys might help me hear what my wife...unh...oopsie.. Hey, mebbe some things ARE better unheard. At least some times.

J, t R