My platform for President of the United States Of America is Criminal Law. It is developed from my Method of Education. I was ordered to create and or invent by the United States Army that is now intact regulating the United States Government protecting it through Military Intelligence Computerization Management a new Disipline I invented and the Administration of Criminal Law Laws across the board.Really, folks, could he do any worse than what we've had in the White House for the last fifty years or so? It would probably at least be fun to listen to his speeches.
And who knows? After the Praetorians slaughtered everything Caligula-shaped in the palace and dragged crazy old Claudius out from under the stairs and made him emperor on a lark, he didn't do half badly by Rome...
(H/T to Matt.)
12 comments:
Wasn't it from behind the palace drapes? And besides, he bribed the guards in the time honored fashion of a politician.
Ye gods. That site is a joke, right?
Well, yes and no.
I'm sure he's as serious about his candidacy as Hunter or Kucinich.
Painful, is about all I can say.
I'm getting a big Johnny Cochran vibe here, and suggest campaign slogan of "If he comes correct, we must elect."
Yes, I know my blog is awash in ingnernt fluff, but I would worry if any of my friends would allow me to post such an embarrassing bio. He must not have any friends.
Sadly, you're absolutely right - how bad could it be?
Good grief - eye-spy with my little Community-Military Intelligence (All Three) Business and Commerce Intelligence eye ...
I thought I saw this in a SNL skit where a prison-self-educated "lawyer" puts together a long verbal sentence containing no articles or nouns - or maybe it was Mad TV...
That's better than an article containing no sentences...
His platform would be "Criminal Law"? What the hell does that mean?
A cop for president?
What a great idea.
I don't know what you guys have against this man. He's a genius! Sure, he would screw up our government, but we'd be able to watch a man in a tin-foil beanie give a State of the Union address. He claims there are two governments and he owns one! He had my vote.
Oh my! This stuff is gold!
"The United States Government must regulate government sleepers and government regulations authorized thought, ideas, acts, actions, rights, wrongs, controversies, facts, issues and circumstantial evidence through intelligence research, law research, law enforcement research and criminal law research implementing ROTC communications research innovating education national and international."
If you can dig down deep enough, beyond the void of syntax, punctuation, and a woeful lack of sentence structure or organized thought, you get this little tidbit: "49. To Prove the United States Government killed my sex life, my wife sex life, my daughter-in –laws sex life both may sons and other of my family members sex life with Espionage Experimentation and Espionage Exploitation sex killing."
Whew, we got us a live one here!
Tamara:
This is without a doubt the ....
OMG words are failing me! This is about the funniest damned thing I've seen on the Interblob this year. Obama better look over his shoulder, Mercer's coming up quick.
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