Wednesday, March 24, 2010

I am the weapon...

...or I was at least.

Yesterday's lunch has finally worn off.

I took six big jalapenos, each the size of a child's fist, halved them, spooned the halves full of seasoned feta cheese, and baked them for a bit.

That was a big ol' plate of crispy hot fresh peppers, let me tell you; I spent the rest of the afternoon in a capsaicin miasma.

I thought about going for a walk on the Monon Trail south of 38th Street afterward, in hopes that a would-be mugger would jump out of the bushes and I could burp in his face, because it would have made this stuff look like Evening In Paris by comparison.

18 comments:

Joanna said...

Good Lord, woman. Think of the children!

Nathan said...

You'd probably have bent or broken a dozen UN protocols in the process.

Should have seized the day :)

Jay G said...

Now *that* is a woman...

Jeffro said...

The EPA would be very angry with you indeed.

Crucis said...

Dragon breath has acquired a whole new level of potency.

atlharp said...

Reow! Next time try some Habanero peppers. You go girl! You haven't lived until you have had one of these

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Savina_pepper

Stranger said...

You have my complete sympathy.

Mi chicano playmates used to munch warm peppers - and give the anglo kids eye wateringly hot habaneros. And any kid who could not eat a handful of Diablos Caliente without heading for the fire hose was - well!

The best field remedy for pepperitis of the tongue is butter. Straight. No bread, no crackers, just whack a quarter stick in half and eat one half. Slowly.

Relief will show up in a few minutes. Complete relief takes longer. But getting that roaring bonfire down to match level is a definite relief.

Stranger

og said...

This is why, under the hot car driving, pistol packing, gun collecting, snark writing tomboy exterior, it's clear you're still a lady.

A man would have posted pictures of the fart-induced roomie vomit.

WV Sneme. A meme of pure snarkiness.

Joseph said...

You need an overshare warning on these type of posts.

Hat Trick said...

Look for some Aji Lemon Drop peppers. They're about as hot as habaneros but have an interesting citrus flavor, at least while you can still taste them. ;-)

William said...

TMI, Tam, TMI.

Mike said...

Government of India going to ghost chile (chili?) spray - over a million on the Scoville scale.

George said...

(Mike)...Oleoresin capsicum sprays currently available in the U.S. can measure from 1 to 5 million Scoville Units, so, the Indians are blowing smoke. Theirs is not a WMD. So much for the Ghost chile...

Anonymous said...

Okay, so you're a hot chick, but that's not what makes you a dangerous weapon...fiery, blistering snark; that's what is feared and revered. Hey, you got a permit for that thang? AT

Jeff said...

Your go/no-go line is as far south as 38th street? I guess maybe with the fire-breath.

Tam said...

52nd, normally.

Weer'd Beard said...

I wouldn't go walking only for fear that the fire-food would break loose a good distance from a comfortable bathroom!

Don said...

Tamara,
try smoking your peppers nxt time you cook on your charcoal grill. split jalapenos, fill with cream cheese and bacon, then cook till brownish over a very smoky hickory fire or with hickory chips added.
cooking over a fire lessens the heat (go figure) and you can have a plateful!