Friday, April 18, 2008

Scooter Trash.

RobertaX wanted to scooter down to Hogshead's BBQ for dinner. I'm all about the barbecue, so I went and got my riding gear.

This meant that there I was, in my Joe Rocket armored leather jacket and gloves and matching helmet, astride 49cc's of fury. Not just 49cc's of fury, but 49cc's of fury that refuses to idle, so I have to keep blipping the throttle at stop lights in downtown Broad Ripple so that everyone can look over and see what a complete twink I look, all togged up for MotoGP in racy red, white, and black leathers and sitting on a hyperthyroidal weed whacker.

Having not ridden a step-through scooter since... oh, 1989 or so, my feet kept trying to find the footpegs under my butt. Disappointed, they would then wander to the floorboards, only to begin a complicated tapdance of looking for shifters and rear brake pedals that weren't there every time I had to turn or stop. It was interesting, in an amusing way. Thankfully, it's hard to get too out of control on a vehicle that requires a long, slightly downhill, straightaway, a heavy throttle hand, and a brisk tailwind to overtop 30 mph by any significant amount.

It was my first time with my knees in the breeze in almost two years. I'll say this, though: It's really hard not to get a big, stupid grin on your face riding the thing. Thank gawd my very serious full-face helmet covered it up.

26 comments:

BryanP said...

Now there's a vision. I haven't ridden a cycle of any sort since I was in high school. I was looking at those little scooters myself since I recently started riding the bus to work. A bit inconvenient, but turning a 40 mile commute into a 6 mile commute is worth a bit of inconvenience. One of those might be just the ticket for my little 3 mile drive. It would look a little weird under a big fat guy like me though.

BryanP

Jay G said...

Someone's gotta say it:

This thread is worthless without pics...

Anonymous said...

"requires a long, slightly downhill, straightaway, a heavy throttle hand, and a brisk tailwind to overtop 30 mph by any significant amount."

What, were you riding two-up?
(VBSEG)

Tam said...

No, it's just that a 49cc motor with a CVT and some manner of carb issues doesn't deliver neck-snapping performance, especially with a full-size adult aboard.

Anonymous said...

To reiterate what JayG said..

Pictures! We demand pictures! :)

Comrade Misfit said...

Any idea why those things are not sold in AR or FL?

Tam said...

No, but I could probably whip up a wild conspiracy theory involving snowbird retirees if you'll give me a minute. ;)

staghounds said...

Congratulations on getting back aboard!

Ken said...

49ccs of fury..."There's no scooters in World of Warcraft!"

My late father in-law (may he rest in peace) had a 1980s-vintage Honda he used to like to play with now and then...wonder if it's still in the shed.

Anonymous said...

Heh. Scooters always seem great until a second later I remember I could not not wear my 'stitch, helmet, gloves, etcetera, etcetera after all these years of riding. Once you're at that stage in the game prep, I'd have to go all the way to something that requires swinging over a leg.

Now, if that one dang part would get back here from the machinist so I can get my old airhead Beemer on the road!

Jerry in Texas said...

Hogshead BBQ rawks! I went to high shool with the owner. They used to be located in Pitsboro, just 5 miles down the road from me. I was very sad when they relocated to BR.

Glad you got your knees in the breeze!

Tango Juliet said...

Sounds like that beast needs a nip o' Gumout.

Racing fuel + 4* more spark will wake it up. 32 MPH or bust!!

theirritablearchitect said...

Two-strokes are rather notorious for gumming up the carb.

Try putting a few capsful of a product called SeaFoam into the tank with the next fill up.

It may smoke a little more for a while, but what it's doing is cleaning out some of the excess carbon from the system.

Works wonders in my string trimmer.

Tam said...

Ah, but this is a 50cc four-stroke weed whacker.

perlhaqr said...

Thanks for wearing the entire power ranger outfit even though it was "just a scooter".

I've heard too many people give that excuse for not wearing safety gear. Maybe it looks silly, wearing it all, but nothing looks sillier than not being able to tie your own shoes anymore.

I got serious religion about gear almost 2 years back, when I low-sided on the freeway, and walked away from it.

theirritablearchitect said...

"Ah, but this is a 50cc four-stroke weed whacker"

Don't worry, it will still work.

two or four-stroke, it doesn't matter.

It's a concentrated fuel detergent.

You can even put it in the crankcase to loosen sludge, if the engine has been neglected for many years.

Hunter said...

Sounds like West Germany in the '80s. A crowd of leather-clad bikers, full Moto gear would enter a bar. Going outside there would be a row of Mopeds parked in front.
Gotta learn how to do it somehow.

Anonymous said...

Hunter--

I remember those same German biker gangs in the Seventies, all leather and studs and chains, the whole herd of them looking like they stepped out of the German version of the Hell's Angels, except for the sounds of "ring-ding-dinnggggg".

I laughed my tanker butt off...
MC

Anonymous said...

ROTFLMAO

For those that need a visual

Anonymous said...

Addictive little beasts, aren't they? I've ridden 50's and 125's for several years now. A 125 can go pretty much anywhere if you stay on "blue highways". Not quite big when it comes to acceleration or sportiness. But quite easy on the maintenance (no chain!) and they just sip fuel.

And, heck, for my 6 mile commute I put on the armored cordura jacket and textile pants and full face. A low speed impact crash early in my scootering career taught me "gear=life". Last time I ever wore a half-helmet, too.

Anonymous said...

Tam, you are always welcome to come and hang out with the "Abby" gang and put a leg over anyone of our "scooters":)
They do, however, have one or two ponies more than your latest beastly steed:)

Mr. Abby

Anonymous said...

Pictures. I need pictures.

Earl said...

Let me see... Tam is a giant weapons expert wearing leather with lots of color on a tiny scooter, and hiding the silly smile behind the full face helmet. I don't need a picture, I am imagining how deep into the lean she could take that little engine that could. I know there will be more two wheels in happy lives, go gently.

Mikael said...

Yeah I've ridden a couple of 125cc scooters and that's put a grin on my face, caught myself going 60mph down a highway in thailand wearing nothing but a flimsy shirt, shorts, sandals and a three-quarter helmet... I slowed down a little bit then(50mph is plenty in those clothes).

I've only ridden as passanger on 50cc ones.

Chuck Pergiel said...

You very funny girl.

Anonymous said...

{hah} You should see the video of me on a friend's 280cc Scorpa trials bike last week. That's the first time I was on two wheels since that drunk got my Sportster on I-20 east of Atlanta, twelve years ago.

I didn't do the log obstacle very well, and nobody will ever see that video.