So I can't get a WiFi signal on my Eee and am reduced to the dead tree edition of the WSJ for my morning cardiac stimulation.
I am not disappointed: Smack in the middle of page one is a story about the Nekkid Pumpkin Runners in Boulder being hassled by The Man. Apparently, one guy streaking through the streets with a gourd on his noggin during All Hallow's Eve was cute, five or ten was a tradition, but the 150 they had last year was getting a mite out of hand, so this year the Boulder po-po is getting ready with the paddy wagon.
Now, while I'm generally on the side of the runners, I can kinda see the cops' point of view, too: There is a law on the books, even if it dates from days when even piano legs were modestly covered. One interviewee's response was priceless, however: "It kind of reminds me of what's happening in Tehran..."
Say what? Look, hippie, nobody's going to hang you or cut anything off, okay? You're exhibiting the same finely tuned sense of proportion as a sixth grader who threatens suicide because she doesn't get to go to spend the night at the slumber party with her friends.