Wednesday, March 10, 2010

To whom it may concern:

If the authorities are reading this, I want them to know that I am not at all disgruntled. I am as gruntled as gruntled can be. If ever I feel my gruntle ebbing, even the slightest little bit, I promise I will seek help and not act out, okay?



(Okay, look, if somebody's obviously gearing up to take their lunch hour atop a clock tower, it may be a good idea to keep an eye on them. But there had better be more meat to this story than "He was fired and he owned guns," because if that was all it took, they could throw half of Elkhart, Indiana in the back of a paddy wagon.)

17 comments:

DirtCrashr said...

I feel all chipper, sprite, and gruntly! I swapped my old HD out and into my new Win7 box as an additional drive, and now Photoshop runs again! Yar!

Anonymous said...

Live in the same town...

I'm not taking down my III flag...

Locals are waiting for the 72 hour period to pass so he's puked out of the system and we can figure out WTF. The media here isn't touching it. We got the one article, and then nattering about the oscars.

Supposedly, the psych evaluation has the possibility of going on your PERMANENT RECORD. Nice loophole.

Glad to see this getting press!

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

And, this is for all gunnies, if you want to help out your fellow 2nd Amendment advocates... if you DO feel compelled to go on a spree, bring your gat with you, but DON'T USE IT. Kill your victims by tickle-fighting them to death, or boring them until they swallow their tongues, or bludgeon them with a frozen 15 pound Sockeye Salmon. It'd do the rest of us a BIG favor. And we'd really appreciate the creative touch you add to your mayhem.

Conversations across this great country will go:

"Oh look, Mabel... According to the evening paper... THIS crazy could have shot up the place but instead caved in their melons with a variety of Ichthys. I guess crazy folk eschew guns these days. Not like when we were young... I guess we should stop looking down out noses at the firearm enthusiasts."

Thank you.

Wai said...

I've been unemployed for over 14 months now and I own guns. But I'm as gruntled as gruntle can be.

B Smith said...

Geez, you can't even get SWAT to respond when a guy on an airplane lights his underwear on fire...

Ken said...

I'm so gruntled I can barely hear you over all the gruntling.

deadcenter said...

Dennis Miller used that joke as the solution to Postal employees going...well...Postal. "Add one question to the application: Are you gruntled or disgruntled?"

Bradley said...

its not like he lived in a free state or anything, i mean come on, why else would have have bought the guns, its not like you could use your old guns to shot someone.

Kristopher said...

I wonder if there is money in offering regruntling services?

How would one go about testing undisgruntlability?

Stuart said...

I like to play with my gruntles... I line them all up in a pretty little row and knock them down by throwing cans of vienna sausage at them... If someone took my gruntles away I would be mighty angry. Maybe the nice police mans were just there to help him find his gruntles. He must be very sad to have had them taken away.

s

Cybrludite said...

I was looking up the meaning of the word gruntle, and it appears to refer to performing the marital act with a lady who's wearing a skirt at the time. (A "double gruntle", it seems, involves the gentleman being attired in a kilt...) I can see how disgruntling a person might make them a bit cranky, then.

WV: drolos I do believe I've found my Mad Scientist name! Bwah-hahahaha!

tomcatshanger said...

Hey Tam, to bring back your comment from Uncles place, if they where not keeping track in TN, how would they know you had been buying about one a week for any period of time?

Anonymous said...

Would you consider using your corporate headquarters as ground zero in a presentation on blast damage modeling digruntle?

At least one other employee thought it was funny.

Gerry

Tam said...

tomcatshanger,

I may have had to fill out a 3310 or two in that time.

I still don't know why I went on hold that time; I'm merely speculating.

staghounds said...

Je suis gruntelee.

Justthisguy said...

Well, I'm a former employee, and I'm disgruntled, but I'm a grownup, used to controlling his violent passions, and aware of the laws forbidding us to do murder and suchlike things, which I prolly wouldn't do anyway, seeing that yelling at people on the internet usually cools my jets enough to let me get a good night's sleep.

Anonymous said...

There ought to be some ex-cops doing a lot of hard time over this bullcrap:

18 USC 241 ( http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/18/usc_sec_18_00000241----000-.html )

In fact, according to existing federal law, some of those cops could face the death penalty.

Any takers on whether equality under the law still exists within the united States?