Friday, July 27, 2012

That'd be kinda cool, actually...

I dreamed that there was a new Olympic event that was sort of like a mashup of 3-gun shooting and the Biathlon, only in summer, combining cross-country trail running and shooting at various stages and targets along the way. I had been invited with some other bloggers to run the course before the event itself, and I was completely winded, footsore, and exhausted, but having big dirty fun.

I can't see why they don't replace Synchronized Interpretive Dancing with something cool like running around the woods and blasting stuff with shotguns.

I imagine that they'll just toss my suggestion in the same pile with the one I sent in about replacing electric foils with live blades to spice up the fencing events...

37 comments:

staghounds said...

Or upping the ampereage...

JohninMd(help?) said...

Hell, if they can make an event outa snowboarding, syncronized 3-gun would be the bomb. IIRC,the first medal contested for in the summer games traditionally is Free Pistol, in honer of the Baron who helped start the modern Olympics, 'cause he was pistol champion of Europe.

og said...

The foil and epee are too flexible to do much damage, but the saber, well sharp sabers would make for an interesting match.

Henry Blowfly said...

"High Noon" style shootouts with live ammo would be a guaranteed stadium filler.

The US would have to be red hot favorites for gold, and it would have the added advantage of disposing of various enemies, terrorists, fascists, and/or nutcases.

Jeff the Baptist said...

So basically a really modern pentathlon?

Joe Huffman said...

Hmmm... Those targets really should be "reactive". I think I could do a trial run of that at Boomershoot 2013.

How much would people pay to do something like that?

BillB said...

I always envisioned a downhill version of the Biathalon

Downhill racers shooting pop-up targets

Watch one of the old bond films for a template!

The Big Guy said...

I was out at the Royal Artillery Barracks setting up for the Shooting events yesterday.
On the way back in to the IBC we discussed a similar desire:
3-Gun + Motorcycles.
Or Jetskis.

TBG

John said...

Og, the "sabre" used in competition is a toy: about the same weight as a foil, significantly lighter than an epee. There's hardly enough metal there to sharpen. I suggest foil-length tasers to improve the sport.

Brad K. said...

Weren't the original Olympics intended to honor the gods with displays of soldierly virtues?

How about competitive drone strafings and bombings? Or budget defense? Or just a common, simple Olympic sized obstacle course?

But then, I would want an Olympics to be restricted to serving military personnel. Rename the current games "Merchandising Athletics for Entertainment".

Tim D said...

After TGB's comment I just had to chime in with:
skeetsurfing

Time to dig through the DVD collection.

Bubblehead Les. said...

There is actually "Summer Biathlon." Wiki "Biathlon." They've been trying to grow it into an Olympic Level Sport for a while.

But they only use a rifle.

og said...

"Og, the "sabre" used in competition is a toy: about the same weight as a foil, significantly lighter than an epee. There's hardly enough metal there to sharpen. I suggest foil-length tasers to improve the sport"

Oh? The one my dauighter uses in competition, let me sharpen it and see if you think it's a toy. If you want to kill somoene, try poison, or a 45. If you want to make a bloody spectacle that lasts for hours and could still possibly result in both participants surviving, well, saber (or "Sabre" for the effete and the french) is just about perfect, as the Austrians demonstrated with extreme effectiveness in the early part of the last century. Of course theirs was a bit heavier, but predominantly because of the quality of the steel available to them. If they had better steel, their blades would look about as the ones used today

Justthisguy said...

Saber is the best. Chopping is allowed, and you can actually get bruised a bit. I think all of the original Greek Olympic events were really tests of military skills. For instance, I believe the javelin was originally thrown for accuracy.

Somebody tried to popularize Summer Biathlon a while back. Marlin made a really cute little blue rifle for it for a while. I got to shoot one once, at a Friends of the NRA event. I thought Summer Biathlon was kind of candy-assed, as you didn't actually carry the rifle while running.

Weer'd Beard said...

Easy because the Olympians would be competing with guns the antis are actively attempting to ban, and have been banned in most countries.

They wouldn't DARE admit that an AR-15 or a Glock, or a Bellini Semi-auto scatter-gun has a "Sporting Purpose".

Hell just look at how many people are saying "You can't hunt with an AR-15", compared to how many camo-patterned ARs and pictures on hunting forums with pictures of guys smiling with this year's deer with an AR laid out.

Tam said...

Dang, Weer'd!

Why so serious today? :S

Bubblehead Les. said...

Oh, Brother Beard is probably just catching up on some of the News I feed him. And the Fact that his Massachusetts Sen. Scott Brown is now being Endorsed and having a Fund Raiser this weekend as the guest of Anti-Freedom "Mayor of the Universe Mickey Bloomberg of NYC." RINOs at Work, you know.

But it's all cool. Couple of weeks from now, when we gather at KC's Rib Shack for Jay G's N.E. Blogshoot Dinner, he'll be his ol'self.

DirtCrashr said...

Doing it on dirtbikes was my fifth blog-post back in 2004, the moto-biathlon. I hate running.

global village idiot said...

Or just a common, simple Olympic sized obstacle course?

That made me picture Monty Python's "Upperclass Twit of the Year" skit.

Saber? Meh. Scottish Regimental basket-hilts or just go the hell home.

FWIW, I have yet to hear back from anyone from the Winter Olympic Committee about my "Cat Curling" idea.

gvi

DirtCrashr said...

The "Auge Gottes" dorm I lived in in Vienna (1979) on Nussdorfferstrasse had a group of Bruderschaften that inhabited the lower floors with a fencing Salle, and using the Sabre the practiced Mensur, - and they had a doctor to patch up the wounded. Occasionally, going up and down the stairs one would pass another youth who had a big gauze bandaged on the ear or left-side of the head. Sometimes you'd see them later without the bandage, and even a lightweight sabre can turn an normal ear into a squiggly piece of broccoli.

John Richardson said...

Earlier this I week I came across some of the earlier biathlon rifles. Prior to 1976 they used full bore military calibers such as the 6.5 Swede and the 7.62x54. You had cut-down Swedish Mausers with folding submachine gun stocks, etc. Moreover, they shot at 100, 200, and 300 yards.

I still think 3-gun would make an awesome Olympic event. I'd love to see Jerry Miculek get a gold medal!

Firehand said...

Weer'd is just following the news, and taking note of the gun bigots and socialists running EUnion and the UN. He's right; they'd collectively shit rabid kittens at the very idea.

Firehand said...

And Joe? The question is more like "What would you charge?"

Anonymous said...

"they'd collectively ...rabid kittens at the very idea."

If ever there was a reason to do this then ...

Ritchie said...

No-dismount unicycle biathlon.

Kristopher said...

I've always advocated turning golf courses into long trail-walk type shoots.

Put a self-loading rifle, a shotgun, and pistol in the golf bag, and shoot 18 "holes".

Get some exercise as well as doing a shoot.

Brad K. said...

@ JustThisGuy,

Maybe substitute the Fiskars machete for the saber? Kind of an modernized version of the Iowa corn knife.

Anonymous said...

Not quite on-thread, but I still like the idea of Greco-Roman ballroom dancing.

Firehand said...

I have no idea who said it, "A golf course is a waste of a perfectly good rifle range."

Anonymous said...

My proposal was for an Urban Biathlon. Similar to riding the Monon trail south of 54th street, the event is a timed cycling ride... but every so often, you get randomly thrown off your bike and have to shoot IDPA style target stages from off the ground. Then remount and ride, and same thing happens again.
Alath
Carmel IN

Once Free Man said...

I like the 3 gun format, but I think a mountain bike or cyclecross trail would be best for the "athletics" portion.
You wouldn't be obligated to use all 3 guns, but the various "stop and shoot" ranges would be best suited to either a shotgun, handgun, or long rifle.

Billll said...

We tried a "Summer Biathlon" involving mountain bicycles and handguns, and it worked out pretty well. Did it all year 'round too.

It would have converted easily into 3-gun. 3 sets of 3 mile bike ride each followed by a pistol stage, a skeet stage, and a long range rifle stage.

Drang said...

The Brits should have let Clarkson design the shooting events.

Bugati Veyron for speed between stages, then Land Rover/Challenger tank on the stages...
(With the odd event like Ford Fiesta Shopping Mall Combat Obstacle Course...)

mikelaforge said...

Biathlon - gunning and running?
Done.
Real world weapons and ammo?
Done.
Real world reactive targets?
Done.
Who?
Marcus Luttrell.

Anonymous said...

Tam, you can RUN? I'm a tad jealous. Your surgeon must have had a better construction background that mine.
--Tennessee Budd

Tam said...

Tennessee Budd,

"Tam, you can RUN? I'm a tad jealous."

Fairly shambolicly, but yes. :D

Robin said...

Stolen from nk:

"am I the only one who thinks women’s basketball is a waste of two good rollerderby teams? (I won’t say what men’s volleyball is a waste of.)"