Saturday, July 04, 2009

It's important to have your priorities straight...

North Korea salvoed seven IRBM's (Intermediate Range Ballistic Missiles) of a type apparently related to the SS-1 "Scud" into the Sea of Japan yesterday as...

...hey, did you hear? Michael Jackson's coffin was made right here in Indiana!


Anonymous said...

It all began with Chris Economaki, back when TV first discovered NASCAR. Really. He'd stick his microphone to a driver's face and ask, "How does it FEEL to blow an engine while leading the Daytona 500?"

It's all been downhill from there. Nowadays, it's, "Mrs. Jones, how does it feel to have a guy with an axe come into your dining room while the family is eating supper and kill everyone but you?"

See, the problem is, nobody asks, "How does it FEEL to know that North Korea is launching IRBMs?" Or, "How does it FEEL to know we're in the worst depression, ever?"

But, hey, everybody's talking about how they feel about the Moonwalker...


Anonymous said...

Thar is sooo disrepectful, how can they sit there and test missile while the world mourns the King of Pop?

BobG said...

"Michael Jackson's coffin was made right here in Indiana!"

And here it is.

Tam said...

Anon 9:47 wins the internets!

Brad K. said...

I prefer the Michael J. Fox approach, from "Secret of My Success".

"He died. We buried him."

I guess Michael Jackson had to be buried. The local elementary school wouldn't let his ashes be scattered there.

Well, that and Jermaine and the other hangers-on make more money with another Graceland type grave / tourist attraction.

And I couldn't sleep last night, worrying. If Michael Jackson had been ancient Egyptian, how many boys would have been sacrificed to serve him in the afterlife? How many chimps?

And did Kim Jong Il really have Michael Jackson done away with, as his understanding of how to hurt America worse than threatening nuclear war?

Is anyone taking up a collection to add MJ's face to Mount Rushmore? And is it true that "Weird" Al Yankovic and Dr. Demento will co-emcee the memorial service? Will the real hero of "Billy Jean" and child dance the celebratory dance at the service? Did the state of California really demand an environmental impact statement before allowing the plastic-riddled body to be interred? Are the Navy, Air Force, and Army really duking it out, on the order that they will be doing flyovers at the memorial service and when they drop the box in the dirt? Did the embalmer really keep snippets of the body and dribbles of fluids, that will be listed (no reserve) next week on ebay? (Just imagine having 2 cc of the last urine that MJ hadn't pissed yet.)

But I do miss Karl Malden, a good man.

Anonymous said...

time for action. There is a related post at

Anonymous said...

In the immortal words of Dr. McCoy:
"He's dead..."


wv: redust
What all the real parts of MJ will do eventually.

Crucis said...

And Michael Jackson is still dead.

Anonymous said...

Who's concerned about how many missiles they fire into the sea? If we handle it right, maybe they'll get rid of more of them in the same way. Maybe we can double-dare them not to fire any more. Likely, they'll show what they think of us, by firing some more.

Unknown said...

The End of the World will not be televised.
Thank you.
We now return you to The Life and Times of Michael Jackson.

Anonymous said...

I could care less about the internet. The fact that I was able to make you smile, {even though you are in fact a total imaginary person} that is what will make me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Dr. StrangeGun said...

I wonder how long NK can be kept at the current level of tit-for-tat with the missile launches and testing and whatnot before they run out of supplies... provided someone's not providing from outside the borders.

capcha: biting. How apt.