IU sophomore Stephen Hammoor says he dreams of being a writer.
Well, keep dreaming, Steve.
Fourteen years of my tax dollars subsidizing this guy's spitball fights and study hall note-passing, and he's still having trouble constructing a coherent sentence? Kid, give up; some dreams just aren't meant to be. Somewhere there is a spatula or a shovel with your name all over it.
(H/T to One Man's Vote.)
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17 comments:
They don't call it the Indiana Daily Stupid without reason.
What a maroon.
Jim
"Everywhere I go, I'm asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them." -- Flannery O'Connor
I have a dream of competing in IPSC. Maybe the link taxpayers of Indiana could see it in their hearts to subsidize my ammo? And a nice bull barrel?
There's an almost 100% chance that my groupings will be superior to the young lad's sentence structure.
The very definition of sophomoric.
Yup, the world needs ditch diggers. And there is nothing at all wrong with that. Go out their Stephen and be the best damn ditch digger you can be. You'll probably be happier, too. Just ask Mike.
Oh, damn.
To be twenty-ish again, smug and certain that I knew everything and everything I knew was RIGHT.
He has had one semester of experience, and he has discovered that people read and disagree with him. Astounding!
But I do think that youthful cockiness serves an evolutionary purpose as a short-term substitute for wisdom. It keeps you going until you actually learn something.
Wow. That's as bad as the "I felt bad because reading things I didn't like made me feel sad, and that makes the professor a racist" column that was written in my old school paper a few years back.
In terms of "coherent sentences" (setting aside the writer's sentiments), young master Stephen is not that bad.
Ask anyone who has taught English 101 ("freshman comp.") at a large state university, as I did for 17 years.
... young master Stephen is not that bad.
That's just depressing.
Thanks so much for sharing that with us, Tam. :(
I couldn't resist:
Nobody cares what you think, Stephen. But do come back when your face clears up and we'll see if you've developed any views worth reading.
@mariner
At least his sentences have subjects and verbs.
Joel, it must be contagious. I left a small missive also. Rather like kicking a puppy, but it might keep some of the furniture from being chewed on.
Hey, Chas S. Clifton is a newbie here, right? He and CGHill just made my blogger list.
I thought my student newspaper was bad... but even the opinion pieces don't have this level of drivel.
You know, I wrote a column for the Ball State Daily News back in the day ... of course, this was after my epiphany that "I'm only 22 and I don't know jack."
The funniest part for me is that he's more secure in his positions not because he faced and defeated the opposition by further developing his arguments, but because "people said bad things about me, so that must mean I'm right." What a douche. I hope he remembers that the purpose of a tool is to be used by someone who knows what they're doing.
@Ed Foster,
Long-time reader, rarely a commenter.
:-)
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