Thursday, August 06, 2009

Please stay off my side.

The joking nickname for Beech Grove Firearms in the circles in which I run is "Death Camp Guns & Gear", because it's almost literally across the street from the Amtrak rail car repair facility that some tinfoil hatter decided was a FEMA concentration camp, (much to the surprise of the people who work there, since their job is fixing choo-choo trains and not nerve-gassing patriots.)

These days the .gov can't do any construction without some loony tune on the internets raving about how it's really a secret bunker for the Illuminati. For instance, a barracks construction project at a New York ANG base was spotted for a clandestine Gnomes of Zurich hideout by one Nancy Genovese who, like a moth bumping off a porch light, kept showing up with her camera looking for damning pictures of flying saucer wreckage or whatever until they finally arrested her on some dubious charges.

When they did, it turned out she had a Benelli Nova bird gun and an Assault Weapons Ban-compliant Bushhamster M4gery in the car, along with enough ammunition to have a pretty good weekend at the range. (But only two spare mags; obviously not a Thunder Ranch grad.) Now, it's a good thing they didn't pull me over on the way to the range, because the trunk of my car on the way to Wildcat Valley would net them a junk-on-the-bunk display that'd make Genovese look like a rank amateur. However, I rarely combine range trips with scouting missions against the New World Order, so the point is kinda moot.

Of course, she has sent the lefties into spasms of "zomg right wing terrorist militia!" Nice work, Nancy.

(Oh, but Mr. Neiwert? She may be a complete wookie-suiter, but she's right about the "Molon Labe" part.)

25 comments:

Caleb said...

I'm going down to Tennessee in Sep for the Tri-State Regional match with a couple of other shooters from the Indy/Metro area. Can you imagine the "junk on the bunk" picture from that?

"This is Jennifer Estradoz reporting live from MiddleBFE, TN where three Indiana men were arrested with a cache of weapons and over 5,000 rounds of high performance ammunition!"

yeeeesh

kahr40 said...

At the moment I have about 3000 rounds of handgun ammo and a coulpe of sleeves of shotgun shells in my van and that just the ammo. What she had ain't nothing.

Jay G said...

Tam,

Weerd Beard and I were joking about that as we made our way to the Northeast blogger shoot. Between the two of us, we had nearly two dozen firearms, close to 10,000 rounds of ammunition, and enough magazines to sink a small boat.

In Massachusetts.

We figured at the very least we'd get a SWAT team and the National Guard...

Joanna said...

" ... two Indiana men and one minor carrying false identification ... "

FIFY X-D

*flees*

In other news, people like Genovese are the reason I have a drawer in my mental file cabinet labeled "Shut up shut up you're making us look like idiots." Cf. Pat Robertson, the "Creation Museum" and anyone with a "What About The Birth Certificate?" bumper sticker. (For the record, I am a creationist, just not a "Creationist".)

Buck said...

Thank god HAARP is in Alaska. Can you imagine the swarm.

Tam said...

"Thank god HAARP is in Alaska."

That's just what they want you to think.

(For some real fun, Google tackamarks.)

Caleb said...

Sweet zombie lord, I just read the comments section at Crooksandliars. I've got 30 IQ points that just went AWOL, I need help finding them before I lose the ability to form a coherent sentehadlkfhaghs..sja;ghaf

Tam said...

Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right...

Caleb said...

I can't hear that song without thinking of Resevoir Dogs.

This meets the criteria then for "things that are rad".

Buck said...

Just proves the U.N. shadow government's conspiracy against the American citizen. They don't need the black helicopters THEY'VE GOT SIGNS.

Noah D said...

Not going to Crooks and Liars, I already know what's there - the title is entirely self-descriptive.

Tackamarks, though...

Uh...

Okay, that's got to be the most clueless, crazy-paranoid things I've ever seen, and that includes the Truthers and 'Endless US War' folks on the other side.

Sign and cats-eye codes? All I can see is some Grand Fenwickian officers pouring over a Official Sekrit Code Book, trying to decipher the back of a highway sign when a Private walks up with a GPS and a road atlas. 'Uh, sirs...'

FEMA inoculation centers? Isn't that what they're supposed to be doing? We keep dodging the flu bullet, but someday we won't.

rightwingprof said...

Remember Linda whatshername back in the 90s? She was with some Indiana militia. She made all of those nutty "documentaries" that aired on my (at least) local TV channel. The camera would zoom in on a stop sign and there would be some label on it, probably a price tag some kid had slapped on, and it was a secret signal to the secret New World Order UN/Clinton black helicopters that were going to invade and take us over.

What was her name ...

rightwingprof said...

Linda Thompson. She even has a wikipedia entry:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linda_Thompson_(attorney)

Tam said...

"The camera would zoom in on a stop sign and there would be some label on it, probably a price tag some kid had slapped on, and it was a secret signal to the secret New World Order UN/Clinton black helicopters that were going to invade and take us over."

Actually, those stickers are the date code for when the sign was erected, so that the DOT will know when the magic reflector sparklies have gotten all weathered and the sign needs to be replaced. They're slapped on pretty randomly, but you can't tell the wookie-suiters that...

Nat said...

Wow! I'm as paranoid as the next guy (or gal) but WOW! That takes things to a level that hasn't been seen since Orwell. I don't know who to be more afraid of the Tackamark folks or the CrooksandLiars crowd....

I'm locking my doors now.

DirtCrashr said...

What if the road-sign has additional holes in it, from shootin'?
and what about...those shoes tied-together and hangin' from the phone-lines?

Ken said...

and what about...those shoes tied-together and hangin' from the phone-lines?

Hey! I was in the Three-Oh-Three, me and Scott Beauchamp hit the beach together....

Anonymous said...

"She may be a complete wookie-suiter . . ."

Wookie, please! Bongwater is not for drinking, wookies.

After her criminal litigation is over, she can motion the court to transfer her probation to New Hampshire. She'll be right at home there.

Shootin' Buddy

Brandon said...

"Complete wookie-suiter" really ought to be accompanied by some kind of beverage warning!

Anonymous said...

"'Complete wookie-suiter' really ought to be accompanied by some kind of beverage warning!"

My vote: Mountain Dew.

There would also be a warning about Cheetoes, Cheetoe dust, watching Star Trek, thinking Reason magazine is serious political commentary, complete lack of exercise, and having a Ron Paul poster fall off the wall of your mom's basement hit you in the head.

Shootin' Buddy

Kristopher said...

Those blue catseyes on the pavement are put there by the fire department to mark fire hydrants.

Dumbasses.

Anonymous said...

Ha Ha Ha, you just think we're tinfoil hat wearing fools, but the joke is on you. Those TACMAR clowns are really our secret Ninja strike force, cleverly hiding our secrets in plain sight. So obvious that everyone dismisses us and we can get away with anything.

ANYTHING, I say!

Cue Dr Evil laugh...BWA HA HA HA HA HA.

Wait...was I just talking in my outside voice?

Anonymous said...

Tam; Nice job trying to cover it up, but it's now obvious you're in on it somehow. -- Lyle

Anonymous said...

Thousands and thousands of rounds...and the equipment to make more!

[Bumper sticker: Warning! Driver may be off his meds!]
Olde Force

wv: SUROC - not a wookie.

John B said...

There's a reason all these people live in basements. They could hurt themselves if they lived above ground.

wv: dissin - I sure would be!