Friday, June 05, 2009

No we can't!

Remember when you were little and you were whining to go to Disneyland or order a large pizza for supper or to get that shiny new toy, and your dad said "No, we can't afford it"?

He said that because he was a grownup, and it was his job to be responsible.

We need a new political party in Washington, to get the checkbook away from the 537 people who have been kiting checks like a runaway teenager who boosted mom's purse. Not the G.O.P., because they're part of the problem.

We will call ourselves the G.U.P.: the GrownUp Party, and our motto will be "No we can't!"

Chant it with me now:

"But all the other kids have ice cream and free universal health care!"

"No we can't!"

"Dad, I need a loan to keep my lemonade stand and automobile manufacturer in business!"

"No we can't!"

"No fair! Suzy got bailed out of her dumb high risk loans! Bail me out, too!"

"No we can't!"

"I want to go to Mars, North Korea, and Six Flags!"

"No we can't!"

We could have us a movement.


Ken said...

To modify something you said a few weeks ago to suit this purpose, "Anything anyone does on Mars is tax-free!"

(But if you expect the Solar Guard to come bail your silver-lame-clad butt out, Dr. Robinson, expect to get a sizable bill. Payable in gold or silver.)

aczarnowski said...

I'd vote for that.

Can the party symbol be a coiled up rattler?

Earl said...

No, WE can't! Cause there aren't enough thinkers to chant the truth.

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

Tam for President!

Hunsdon said...

We're going to turn Afghanistan into Arizona!


Man, that thing works ANYWHERE. And the Gods of the Copybook Headings with fire and slaughter return!

Turk Turon said...

We're Americans!

We can spend our way out of anything!


Anonymous said...

I'm on board. As far as I'm concerned we can start on this today.

Now, all we need is a plan to get from where we are now to where we need to be tomorrow.

I have one, but I'm not sure the rope industrial complex has that kind of capacity......

Crucis said...

I agree with the sentiment and the logic. But, I'd rather say, "No, we won't!"

It's not that we "can't", it that we "won't." We can ignore consequences to do just about anything, we choose however, to not venture down some paths by choice, "I won't!"

Kristopher said...

I think Eric Frank Russell has done this one already ...

No I won't.

Tam said...

No, it's not "won't", it's "can't".

That's the part that gives people conniptions; it's not being "obstructionist" to point out that you can't spend money you don't have.

Tony said...

Whoa there! No trips to Mars? If we do not develop space travel, how will we ever escape all the idiots? Because frankly, the odds on which way the future will go on this mudball are overwhelmingly on the side of the overwhelming majority - the idiots.

Chris said...

A movement? Can I sit on the Group W bench and play with the pencils?

Anonymous said...

A real movement, as opposed to the movement (classifiable on the Bristol Stool Chart) currently stinking up DC?

Joanna said...

I'm fer it.

Tam said...


If we want to go to Mars, we'll need to get a paper route and pay for it ourselves.

Kristopher said...

Waddayou mean we can't spend money?

We still have working printing presses in the mint.

$100,000,000,000,000 cups of coffee are a small price to pay for a communist utopia!

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

No real comment, but could not waste this wv:


Isn't that a gun show? :)

Unknown said...

I am thinking of switching my party to "Tea Party"